London shop girl
I once shagged a 19-year old shop girl from London.

We had quite a romance, actually. I took her to places she'd never been before and showed her amazing sights no-one had ever seen before. We fell out a bit over her dad, but soon patched things up.

I went through a bit of a mid-life crisis when all this shit from my past turned up, but she helped me through that and saved the day, would you believe, with a kiss.

After that I was a changed man with a new outlook on life and the romance entered a new stage. We were giddily happy, madly in love and wanted everyone to know. I didn't even mind when her ex-boyfriend turned up and came along for the ride for a bit (but I was glad when we had to abandon him).

Unfortunately, eventually, some other shit from my past turned up and I had to leave her forever. I thought that was the last I would ever see of her, so I shacked up with a young black trainee doctor from London and then this lairy 40 year old ginger temp (I was getting desperate).

Then the WORST shit from my past turned up and so did she again. This time I sorted it for good (I hope) but had to abandon her again, this time with an awkward compromise which satisfied nobody.

I still miss her. She was fantastic. The age difference? 881 years.

The Doctor
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Fri 5 Dec 2008, 10:40, 6 replies)

G Knee
us.

*umpteen clicks*
(LLamaBoy skived off work on, Fri 5 Dec 2008, 10:44, closed)

Probably the right place
for a joke about it being "bigger on the inside than it is on the outside."

Fnarr.

Have a click.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 5 Dec 2008, 10:59, closed)

Dat's good dat is.
*click*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 6 Dec 2008, 7:49, closed)

The Doctor?
Dr. Who?
(kitescreech still here, Sat 6 Dec 2008, 11:39, closed)

"Who you callin' a gingah temp?"
"Actually, I ain't vat bovvered"
(Harleif Skankhammer II was killing time at, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 1:52, closed)

All it needed was the final line
"she had a mimsy like a fiery Tardis"
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 9 Dec 2008, 16:23, closed)