Wasps and Beetroot...
I used to live in the Wilds of Herefordshire and its no exaggeration when they used to say (proudly) 'Herefordshire born and bred, strong in the arm, thick in the head'

One of the guys who played crib with my ex husband had issues with a growing wasp nest outside his front door.

Inspired by my then husband's tale of how I ridded the house of pesky flies (they used to hibernate in the thick walls in the winter, and hundreds used to reappear on warm spring days) by hoovering up the filthy little buggers with my hoover (it gave me a perverse sense of satisfaction, and made me giggle a bit madly - look, life can be pretty boring being married to a sheep farmer!!) SO, his mate took his own hoover to the wasps nest early one evening (when they start bedding down for the night) and hoovered the bloody lot up!!

Ok, so that sounds a pretty good idea so far - I may would have attempted that myself...

But not even Mr Stupid of number 1, Stupid Street, Idiot Town, would then take the hoover INSIDE, and remove the "now filled to the brim with a thousand angry stinging things" hoover bag - and open it in his front room!

OBVIOUSLY, he got stung hundreds of times, and eventually the stinging frenzy subsided and he managed to escape, desperately looking for some vinegar to neutralise the stings - but all he could find was a jar of beetroot - which he tipped over himself - and then, somehow, managed to get himself to hospital.

I can't imagine what A&E staff thought when they saw THAT coming through their doors!!
( curvylittlegoth heard the voices in your head on, Thu 20 Dec 2007, 15:28, 1 reply)

fucking *click!"
silly bastard..
( Azra3l Lubrication Persuasion and Brute Force ™, Thu 20 Dec 2007, 18:24, closed)