Showers are for self-loathing in. Loudly.
I talk to myself, probably daily. Sometimes, I re-enact moments of embarrassment from decades ago, usually without props. At other times, something faintly Tourettes-like happens, where I swear without heed to grammar, coherence or whether I even want to say anything. Occasionally, I have proper conversations. One party to said conversation speaks only in my head, while the other gets use of my mouth.

So far, we seem to argue. A lot. Both of us agree that I'm a cunt, though.
(Mr. W. K. Kellogg's Anusol Flakes (TM) is the other Special K, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 13:50, 7 replies)

.
Sobriety and exercise cures those negative head conversations on about a week, I discovered!
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 14:18, closed)

^What she said.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 14:19, closed)

Endolphins FTW!

( The_Commander_of_Skips wears his sunglasses at night, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 18:20, closed)

Not just me
then.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 15:38, closed)

Atleast you don't pretend to be back in time and have to show ancient civilisations what shampoo is.
~looks shifty~

A bit of self loathing is always good. Much better than being a bloated head twat! Brings you down to earth a bit, just so long as you notice the good things too.
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 16:51, closed)

Speaking of shampoo..
I did once attempt a Wild West demonstration of sorts in the shower. For my own edification, you understand. This took the form of lassoing a shampoo bottle with a bit of soap on a rope that was held with nowt but my pendulous cheeks.

I learnt some lessons that day. They were:

1. Wet soap on a rope will not be held by cheeks alone. I had to push it.. further upwards, shall we say. Not altogether unpleasant.
2. If performing (1), rinse ring thoroughly afterwards. Ringpieces dry out alarmingly well, it turns out. Perhaps use a bidet for arsegargling purposes. Not sure what to moisturise with afterwards, though. There's a gap in the market here somewhere...
3. The wet, squelchy popping noise made by pulling said soap out can be curiously satisfying. If trying to repeat this, please bear (2) in mind.

This digression was brought to you by my apparent inability to stop humming 'Ring of Fire' to myself. Damn you, Johnny Cash.
(Mr. W. K. Kellogg's Anusol Flakes (TM) is the other Special K, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 18:39, closed)

Haha!
This was not something I was expecting to learn today! I'll keep it for a rainy day. Or maybe never... ^-^
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Mon 5 Jul 2010, 20:36, closed)