I’m a Bad Man
Way back in the alcohol dimmed days of my early 20’s I had a very good friend who got married, it was a beautiful affair, and the piss up was top notch, but I had my then wife with me so I had to be a good boy!

A couple of months before this however the same could not be said. I had yet to get hitched and was round my mates house having a few (read lots) of beers.

I remember it well, it was late November, it was cold, and his flat had no heating so we were all sitting on the sofa, under a duvet, watching films. My mate gets up to have a smoke and get some more beer and the next thing I know I’ve got his girlfriends tongue playing with my tonsils! This quickly stopped much to my chagrin as we heard him coming back.

So there we all are under still all under the duvet and I’m thinking that I must have imagined the kiss, when I feel a tentative hand on my crotch! It gets more insistent and ends up inside my jeans rubbing things that it really should not have been, and all with her boyfriend sitting on her other side.

After a few minutes of this she withdrew from my jeans, took hold of my hand and placed it on he thigh, so I just started to gently caress it. A bit later my mate vanished to the toilet again, she kissed me again, and whispered in my ear that I should explore a bit further up!

Now I had always thought that she was a stunner, so I thought why not! I’m still stroking her legs when my mate comes back in with more beer and sits back down. I nip off to have a smoke and use the toilet, come back and slip under the duvet again.

I stroked her leg, and slowly moved upwards only to discover that she had no knickers on! So I went to work on her, and she on me inside my jeans.

My poor mate never had a clue what was going on!

In the February of the next year he was my best man, on the wedding day the three of us bundled into the car to get to the wedding, he’d forgotten something and popped back into the house, she kissed me, and whispered, “You don’t have to get married to her you know, you can have me!” I almost told the cab driver to go to her place but my mate came back!

They got married a bit later, and as she had no family I was walking her down the aisle. We were stood outside the church, just waiting to go in, so I kissed her, and told her that we should run away together, she told me she couldn’t because I was married, and I just told her that I could get a divorce! It didn’t stop her letting me finger her in the doorway of the church though!

I just wish I’d taken the offer the first time, it may have stopped a lot of heartache, for both of us!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 13:22, 8 replies)

I'm not sure what I'm more shocked at
Your sordid past or the fact that you were once in your early twenties!
( Captain V, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 13:25, closed)

*laughs*
He's old enough to remember when Michael Jackson was black.
( wanderlust, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 13:28, closed)

*OFFICELOL*
Lusty, that still cracks me up!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 13:42, closed)

I'd say
the fact that I was once young!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 13:41, closed)

Bloody hell!
I'm shocked, quite frankly.

Well, given your age, save me a good seat when you get there :p
( Cawl, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:01, closed)

Kaol
Will do.

A nice one, by the fire!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:08, closed)

Sounds good!
I'll bring the marshmallows :D
( Cawl, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:14, closed)

Cool
I'll bring the cocoa.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 15:26, closed)