I hurt my rude bitsSpent all day with a sore bum, went to the loo to check it out and found blood in my pants. Not good. Piles? Checked in the shower and pulled a staple from my arse. Serves me right for leaving an old pencil case in my underwear drawer. BTW: On relating this story to a friend they said, "some people will do anything for a prick up their bottom."
(
rob, Thu 13 Jul 2006, 22:00)
« Go Back
Not me but a friendHeard from a friend about a man who was in the office and went to the toilet to "drop the kids off at the pool". Quite an urgent occasion, he rushed to sit down, hands on the toilet walls, span round and landed (not even enough time to lay down the standard 5 sheets for public toilets). It seems that the lid was cracked and loose.
So somehow as he lowers himself, he manages to get his tip trapped in a crack at the front of the seat, his own weight holding the crack firmly shut. He jumps up in absolute agony and the lid (not being screwed on properly) has slid sideways and he is crushing himself. Amidst the searing pain, he tries to lift his body. He cant. Hes trapped. Upon the final push, as it were, he tries to get himself free, slipping off the loose seat and taking the whole pan with him. Sitting in a pool of his own (and others) faeces, he looks down.
Swelling. Strange colours. Weeks.
(, Sun 16 Jul 2006, 17:53, Reply)
« Go Back