Terrible parenting once removed
This has to be the singly most depressing QOTW to date, and happens to hit at the same time as me being affected by the indirect results of bad parenting, so bear with me.

I am seriously lucky compared to all the posters, with the slight exception that I, at 36, am still treated as a child because I'm unmarried with no kids.

However, not the story. My (newly) ex girlfriend. Abandoned by her mum at the age of 3 - didn't see her again until she was 21. Uncaring father, and a bitch of a stepmother who used to alternately ignore her, then beat her. Despite this, and leaving home at 16, she managed to get herself an education, before meeting 'seemingly nice guy' (actually Bastard No.1) at 19 and moving in with him and his 'rents. Along comes a baby, the a house. 'Seemingly nice guy' stays for 2 years, before saying he had to go and work in Spain for a week. Came back 14 years later, exactly on her daughter's 16th. Bastard number 1. They get on now, but only for her daughters sake (who, by the way, is a very nice girl, but quite obviously affected by what had happened).

Bastard number 2. Newly single parented, ex pulls herself together, and goes on to take a part time degree and various vocational quals and get quite a high powered job. Gets together with Bastard no. 1's best mate (Bastard No. 2). Bastard No. 2 gets her pregnant, beats the shit out of her regularly, grinds her down until she feels she's no better than menial work, and does exactly that. Things get so bad she eventually plucks up courage and leaves, literally with a suitcase and the kids, leaving the house she owns 50% of. Bastard No. 2 (I should mention at this point he is a FUCKING SOCIAL WORKER) then puts their child through a paternity test (quote - so everyone will think you're a slag) and in 4 years has refused to pay any child maintenance, despite earning more than 35K. And needless to say, the Child Support are worse than useless.

A year later, she and I (NotBastard) meet, and fall head over heels. Bastard No. 2 gets to hear, and isn't happy. Spends most of his time with his son and anyone else who'll listen telling them that she is a 'whore' who advertises sex on the internet (we met through a well known (clean) dating site). Does everything possible to ruin our relationship. Comes round one night when I'm not there and beats her up. We go away for the weekend, he reports us to the police for 'abducting his son'. As a social worker, he has mates in the police (sorry should mention I dont consider social workers or police as twunts, just him), so his mates treat it 'seriously' as a 'favour'. Cue the most upset person I have ever met in my life.

After a year of the happiest time in our lives (and it was both of us, there was no faking her feelings) she splits with me, saying that she thought it was a love of the 'want to be with you all the time and forever' but it was actually a love of the 'you're a lovely person and I love being with you'.

So because I'm not an utter wanker (or alternatively Bastard number 3), I'm left utterly, utterly desolate thanks to the efforts of three crap parents - her mother and her two ex's. Thanks a fucking bunch you wankers - because of your efforts she thinks she doesn't deserve to be with someone as nice as me, and you have condemned her to a life with twats like you. I don't blame her, I blame you 3.

Currently spending my days avoiding large drops etc and utterly, utterly confused.

Oh, and *pop* by the way... apologies for length etc, but it's good to vent.
(Chevron71 is oscillating wildly...., Tue 21 Aug 2007, 22:30, Reply)