Alien War
Back in the mid-1990's there was this interactive exhibition type thing in the Trocadero Centre in Picadilly Circus called ALIEN WAR. As a huge Alien fan, of course I could not resist it. I paid my fiver not knowing what really to expect - some blokes in xenomorph costumes behind glass, clips from the films, etc. NO WAY was I prepared for what was about to come!

I (and about ten other people) are led into a dark room that looks like the medroom set from Aliens and "briefed" by Colonel Hardass, who tells us we we're a group of scientists visiting xenomorphs in captivity that we must be extremely careful, as these things are dangerous, etc etc. Pretty much what I was expecting.

After about two minutes of this, a shrieking alarm blares out and all the lighting goes emergency red, and I shit my pants (not for the first time). Colonel Hardass cuts the alarm, presses the intercom and we hear a garbled message along the lines of "AAAAGHHH! THEY'RE KILLING US! GET US OUT OF HERE AAAAAAAAAAIEEEEE!" and I shit my pants again.

Col H calls for calm whilst telling us that the worst has happened - the aliens have all escaped, and are marauding their way through the space station killing all in sight!

By this point, my legs are actually shaking with fear. NOW I KNOW the xenomorphs aren't real, and I knew so back then; but such is the power of the Alien films (well the first two), and so convincing was the set-up and the acting skills of Col H (really, he could have fitted in right beside Apone, Vasquez et al) that the knowledge that it was all make-believe was USELESS. USELESS. USELESS. However much the rational side of my mind tried to convince me this was all fake, it was shouted down by the (larger) irrational side of my mind which screamed GAME OVER, MAN! GAME OOOO-VER! on a continual loop. From that point on, I and my fellow scientists were, effectively, inside an Aliens film. And we all know what happens in those. Bloody, violent DEATH!

Col Hardass informs us that we have to make our way through the station to the shuttle-bay, there to make our escape. With no time to think we are hustled along a Nostromo-like corridor shrouded in dry ice, with Colonel Hardass urging continual vigilance. Minutes pass, there are nervous giggles and my legs are STILL shaking. NOTREALNOTREAL/GAMEOVERGAMEOVERGAMEOVER. Suddenly a door BUSTS open and Lieutenant Injured falls through, screaming in pain and holding an arm which is covered in blood. So convincing was his acting and the make up that I actually felt cold fear rise up from the soles of my feat to my balls. Lt Injured briefs us on the situation - we're all fucked - before being spirited away somewhere (such was the terror and confusion I can't remember what happened to him).

We are then hustled along another corridor at the end of which suddenly appears - an alien!

I've no idea to this day how they did it (film projection, smoke and mirrors, man in a suit?) To all intents and purposes, we are faced with an actual alien, out of Alien (well, Aliens, it was one of the ones with a ridged carapace). Everyody, EVERYBODY, SCREAMS and immediately runs back the other way! Col H is nowhere to be seen. I still remember the blind panic of those moments, I was shoving people aside to get them behind me so that the alien would get them and not me. It sounds pathetic, but it was so realistic that it felt like the real thing and by now all of us were on such an adrenaline high that we were utterly convinced it was real.

Suddenly Col H re-appear and bundles us into a lift - which I swear to this day I could feel plummeting down at speed. At the bottom the doors open to reveal another alien! This one must have been a man in a suit as he - it - REACHES INTO THE LIFT AND GRABS THIS GIRL'S ARM! I still remember her shrieks of pure terror.

Out the lift the other side - and we find ourselves in a chamber of alien eggs, swimming in dry ice. By now all of use are insane with terror, so we don't have to be told to be careful as we wind our way through the xenomorphic minefield. Thankfully (though rather disappointingly in retrospect) none of the eggs open, and we make it into the shuttle. By this time I was gibbering. "Check under the seats!" I shout before we strap ourselves in. "Good man!" grunts Colonel Hardass and my heart swells with pride. Then the shuttle takes off with a great shuddering and shaking and deafening racket (all effects obviously) and then the doors open to reveal - the gift shop.

"Well done ladies and gentleman you have survived Alien War", say Colonel Hardass and shakes all our hands.

I remember staggering dumbly out into the Spring sunshine of Picadilly Circus, and finding my way to Burger King where I sat, alternately shivering involuntarily and bursting out with laughter. My little mind had been fairly blown. It was two hours before I began to feel even vaguely normal.

I went back again a few years later, but it wasn't as good as the first time (diminishing returns) and it closed in 1996 due to a flood.

I appreciate that at no time was I in mortal danger and that the fear was nothing like that of finding a lump on your balls, but, honestly, I've never been so scared before or since that my legs *actually shook with terror.*

Best fiver I've ever spent!
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 18:09, 15 replies)

I went on that at age 12.
I didn't sleep afterwards for three weeks. And slept with the light on for about 6 months afterwards.

Fucking aliens.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Fri 6 Apr 2012, 19:15, closed)

Wow
This. Sounds. Amazing!

Wish I could have had a go.
(friedel, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:06, closed)

That's a coincidence
I was thinking about that exhibition the other day. I never went but I remember really wanting to. It's a shame I'm sixteen years too late. :-(
(Eukanuba, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:25, closed)

Remember it well!
Well described

When I did it, I was a part of a group in which a couple decided they would do it together. He was a classic macho prat..open shirt, medallion, 'unshaved' look', about 10 years after it was Miami vice trendy. He had his arm around his girlfriend and said "Dont worry, I'll look after you". Through every step of what you described, he pushed her out of the way in abject terror. Her look was of sheer disbelief that he was such a coward..when we all came out at the end, she told him loudly to fuck off and walked away arms crossed (in tight white jeans and stilettos)
(sabre32, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:22, closed)

It somehow pleases me
that the aliens were responsible for a relationship break-up. Makes them ever more cool!
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 17:53, closed)

Nice!
It sounds like it was mostly great fun.




mostly.
(MrC. Having the most boring username on b3ta since 2004, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:30, closed)

Didn't find it scary at all.
But I was prob a bit older and I'd had a couple of beers.

It was ace though. Have a click.

Also: www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-aBs7TB000
( sir_spicious2000 Crap I've watched: www.filmplop.blogspot.com/, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:31, closed)

That brought back memories
I went on there as an oh-so-cool bloke with a date I was hoping to impress. We were both geeks, so it was of interest, and I reckoned she'd be so terrified I'd be getting both hugs and some kudos for being so self-possessed.

Suave detachment was maintained, with some (no doubt) annoying eyebrow raises to the young lady in question as the actors started the script. But when the arm came into the lift I shrieked and hung onto her arm so hard it left a bruise. Man card well and truly shredded.
(paxvobiscum, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 5:52, closed)

I was about 10 at the time and I bottled it about 1/4 of the way into it =(((((
What I did love though was the Mechwarrior pods that were just around the corner, you sit in these pods with loads of buttons'n'switches, playing a Mechwarrior (first person giant stompy robots) type game.

When Sega World first opened and everything was a flat-fee, that ruled too.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 7:32, closed)

It was brilliant
My dad threw me to the Alien in his rush to escape. The bastard. Don't know if it was a one-off, but a girl from our party (presumably a plant) got carried off by an alien.

It was truly terrifying. Work of genius.
( Throat And Ice Pie I see dem tatties dere., Sat 7 Apr 2012, 15:56, closed)

That's the genius of it
it cuts right to the primitive centre of the brain and its everyone for themselves!
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 17:54, closed)

Be really quiet
Ah yeah, I did that exhibition in Bournemouth sometime in the 90's.
We had a bit of a laugh with it, enjoyed the whole thing and the Aliens looked very realistic with strobe lighting and smoke going on.

The bit that stuck out the most was when our Colonial Marine guide bundled us all in the "lift" and instructed us all "..to be quiet as they'll hear us".
Col Marine
"everybody ready?"
"OK, WE ALL GO ON THREE.ONE, TWO, THREE. GOOOOOOOOOOO"
Door opens to see big Alien stood there and Mr Marine lets off a few rounds from his sidearm.
Which was next to my left ear.

I was more scared by the loud bangs right next to me that the Alien.
Worth the money though.
(maceie, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 17:01, closed)

This was a really cool read
made me wish I could go! Cheers guys!

I wonder if they ever changed it for those who went back a few times! Be funny watching guys thinking they know what's coming this time and boom, something new happens and knocks them for six, hehehe!
( ..wil, Sun 8 Apr 2012, 12:08, closed)

I went to a similar thing, run by the Daily Mail
called Illegal Alien War.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 8 Apr 2012, 16:17, closed)

I heard a tale about this
in which one of the participants was so pumped up on fear and adrenaline that when an Alien suddenly appeared the gut went beserk and started beating seven shades of shit out of the poor bastard in the suit and had to be dragged off him.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 10 Apr 2012, 20:51, closed)