Early Treatment of The Fearitis
was brutal but effective

(Tue 11th Jun 2002, 13:51, More)

It was wrong, they knew that
but Science needs its martyrs

(Tue 14th May 2002, 9:05, More)

They called him a madman
but he knew that his work with chinchillas and compressed air would someday help save the world

(Mon 13th May 2002, 11:57, More)

At the Official Opening of the new B3ta Zoo
some animals were better behaved than others

(Wed 8th May 2002, 12:46, More)

Great Inventions of our Time No.94

The Thomas Edison Vacumn Tube Kitten Guillotine
(Wed 8th May 2002, 10:13, More)

Dr Smolletts eye tests were rendered pointless by his constantly variable features

(Tue 7th May 2002, 11:26, More)

.

(Fri 3rd May 2002, 12:44, More)

Worst Job in the World

Giant Airborne Angler Fish Inspector
(Mon 29th Apr 2002, 15:06, More)

..

(Mon 29th Apr 2002, 13:19, More)

Revenge

(Fri 26th Apr 2002, 15:46, More)

weird - I just finished this
Nixon cons Elvis into signing away Graceland in exchange for a forged ticket to The Cheese Lottery - who can be behind it?

(Mon 22nd Apr 2002, 19:34, More)

Evil - pure evil
They wouldn't stop when they had the chance

(Mon 22nd Apr 2002, 16:11, More)

To stop Toilet Dandruff
You need a crack squad of toilet chinchillas

Always vigilant - always ready to strike
(Mon 22nd Apr 2002, 15:06, More)

When Evil Wobble-Headed Clowns Heat Chinchillas on Hot Bricks

(Mon 22nd Apr 2002, 12:50, More)

..

(Fri 19th Apr 2002, 11:45, More)

...

(Fri 19th Apr 2002, 10:22, More)

....

(Wed 17th Apr 2002, 15:22, More)

Well I've spent all day working on Hedley
It's been fun, but all good things must come to an end..

(Mon 15th Apr 2002, 16:30, More)

How does hedley reproduce?
We need to know

(Mon 15th Apr 2002, 14:48, More)

I lied

(Mon 15th Apr 2002, 11:31, More)

Last One Hedley I Promise

(Mon 15th Apr 2002, 11:29, More)

My Imaginary Friend
also protects me against heavily-armed tortoises and manatees

(Fri 12th Apr 2002, 16:06, More)

It's such a shame when people dump giant cats
I wonder how they do it?

(Wed 10th Apr 2002, 11:00, More)

Is Tomsk in?

(Thu 4th Apr 2002, 20:16, More)

Their scientific meddling had opened a gateway to a universe - a universe they could not comprehend

(Wed 27th Mar 2002, 10:48, More)

Ladies & Gentlemen I give to you
The infamous Alexander Grahame Bell Patent Shrew Magnifier/Deflector with added Penguin Exciter

A Wonder of the Modern Age
(Wed 27th Mar 2002, 6:09, More)

Suggestion from the wife

(Mon 25th Mar 2002, 9:28, More)

80's rehab retro

(Fri 22nd Mar 2002, 12:02, More)

Coke Bottle Arse X-Ray Furtive Sneaks Past Ukranian Naked Synchronised Trampolining Team But Is Foiled By Bungee


Christ - 2 bottles of Benylin and I can make ANYTHING
(Wed 20th Mar 2002, 6:51, More)

Furtive in Dance Student Love Outrage

(Tue 19th Mar 2002, 4:33, More)

If you slow down the Zapruder Film

(Mon 18th Mar 2002, 6:33, More)

Obey the Mystic Qabbala of Furtive
Simply stare at the image and you will feel the need to donate all of your money and possessions to B3ta. It worked for me.


(Mon 18th Mar 2002, 3:14, More)

Now this would actually sell....

(Wed 13th Mar 2002, 7:21, More)

Biscuit Losses increasing at Fox's


I wonder why?
(Tue 12th Mar 2002, 5:30, More)

Lumpbucket - your wish is my command


Beaver in a Viva against Ananova in a Vauxhall Nova with Rover and Nikki Sixx in a 206 with Fruitabix
(Mon 11th Mar 2002, 6:00, More)

Or how about this one....
-
(Fri 8th Mar 2002, 9:23, More)

Well, I would buy it....

(Fri 8th Mar 2002, 9:14, More)

Perhaps too attractive......
Now they're in trouble

(Fri 15th Feb 2002, 6:20, More)

My Ultimate Sexual Fantasy
I know a lot of you will agree with this

(Fri 15th Feb 2002, 4:03, More)

» Walkman Flashbacks

Primus 'Tommy the Cat'
Newcastle 1992. Summer of Love - well it was in our street anyway. Windows open, summer sunshine, bongs being smoked and this lovely irish medical student dosing me with mushrooms before a lock-in weekend of ice cream and shenanigans.
(Wed 30th Mar 2005, 16:43, More)

» Pet Names

A very sad and ill looking
Basset hound, with rheumy red eyes was owned by my best mate. It was always padding around the house feeling a little sorry for itself, as it was systematically bullied by his cat, which was aptly named Effin (as in where's that effin cat).
The dog was prone to lying in the corner and generally behaving like it had a massive inferiority complex.
Inevitably he called it Underdog.
(Thu 26th Feb 2004, 22:02, More)