b3ta.com user baby wet ones
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What Is Your Battle Cry?

Striding through the desert, carrying an oversized scalpel, cometh BABY WET ONES! And he gives a booming howl:

"I'm going to fuck you until your mortal mind doth snap, then bake cookies!!!"

Find out!
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Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys



What Video Game Character Are You? I am Mr Do.I am Mr Do.


I am sedentary by nature, enjoying passive entertainment, eating when the mood takes me, and playing with my food. I try to avoid conflict, but when I'm angered, I can be a devil - if you force me to fight, I will crush you. With apples. What Video Game Character Are You?

roll up roll up for issue #1 of Hummus!, it's mighty special momma!

mail me at wobblybob31 at hotmail dot com
i'm the one to blame for them animations on that there infamous fives show on that there e4 y'know. sorry.
www.iamaxford.co.uk
OOh OoH! updatey! got new website thing wiv me mates, they are much cooler than I: www.captainwacky.com. And before you say it,the name is ironic.
squirrel
























Recent front page messages:

awww, the li'l fella likes you!

(Tue 22nd Mar 2005, 13:49, More)

invented purely for the amusement of b3tans:

the 'spongalizer' soon came under fire from animal rights groups.
*edit* ta everybody!
(Wed 28th Jul 2004, 16:14, More)

how ninjas get about

click for flippin out bigness

*edit* ta!
(Thu 17th Jun 2004, 15:00, More)

operating tabletennis

clickage pour le biggage

*edit* ooh! ta!
(Mon 17th May 2004, 16:09, More)

and people wonder why pandas are dying out?

(Thu 15th Apr 2004, 14:51, More)

wheeeee!

(Thu 8th Apr 2004, 15:03, More)

that chicken is acting more and more suspiciously

number 1
number 2
number 3
(Thu 4th Mar 2004, 15:00, More)

what IS that chicken up to?


number1
number2
(Wed 3rd Mar 2004, 15:04, More)

fucking finally


click for stealthy bigness

b3ta aint been letting me in all afternoon.
(Wed 8th Oct 2003, 17:25, More)

ladies and gentlemen, today's potatychop mash


tank it! tank it hard!

edit: woo! thank you magic donkey!
(Fri 1st Aug 2003, 14:21, More)

terror from above!

edit-slowed him down a bit now
(Thu 6th Mar 2003, 18:02, More)

Mommy? Yes dear?

ummmm, nothing!
(Fri 28th Feb 2003, 11:58, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Foot in Mouth Syndrome

I had one of those
horrible 'entire pub goes silent just as you say something really embarrassing' moments. I was sitting in a crowded pub in my home town one saturday night with a very close friend and his younger sister, who I kinda think of as my little sister too, anyway, we were taking the piss out of each other and she made some comment about the size of my todger, I protested, saying she wouldn't know, when I remembered that the previous year we had all skinny dipped in next door's pool at a party at their house, I unwisely piped up quite loudly 'OH YEAH! YOU HAVE SEEN MY PENIS!', of course it had to be that moment when everyone else's conversations reached a natural lull.
(Wed 21st Apr 2004, 14:44, More)

» World's Most Hated Food

I used to have a real physical aversion to peas
just had to put one in me mouth and i'd shudder and gag, full on colly wobbles.
don't mind em at all now, funny how things change when you get all old innit?
(Mon 12th Jul 2004, 16:08, More)

» My Wanking Disasters

ok, this may sound like an urban myth but i swear, on my life, this happened to ME!
ok, i went to the surrey institute of art and design in farnham for my foundation and degree courses, foundation students start a month before degree students, so that year i had my twin room in halls to myself for the first month, then Wayne moved in. wayne was a wanker. that's his real name he deserves exposing. wayne and i didn't get on, we were completely opposite in every sense, anyway, to cut a long story short, one morning i woke up, and deciding i didn't feel like forcing small talk with waaaaayne, i pretended to be asleep still, that's when i heard the rhythmic squelchy slapping sound from the other side of the room (you know the one, pinch your cheek and oscillate it against your teeth, you get the idea) anyway, this goes on for a while, with me getting steadily more disgusted, when suddenly, he starts muttering under his breath 'oh you bitch, ooooh you bitch, oooooh you bitch you bitch you bitch', suffice to say that as soon as he'd finished his noises I got up, got dressed, got down to student services, and got myself a new room! I did hear someone in the plough (the local student pub) relating this legend to his mate, so i can only assume that my anguish and torment have passed into local myth!
(Thu 3rd Jun 2004, 17:01, More)

» Pet Names

also, when we got our dog
we were wondering what to call it, i was all up for 'phlegm', short for phelgmatic, see? or that was my excuse, but my bloody sister won out with her bad pet name choices again! so i had to go down to the meadow with the dog, where all the local freaks hang out, and shout for 'FUDGE' (this was mid wales, so it weren't exactly hampstead heath, but still, you don't wanna advertise like that!)
(Wed 25th Feb 2004, 16:17, More)

» Pet Names

my older sister once got a hamster and called it Arfurr
y'know, as in R - for - Rabbit? it's a rubbish name that's been done to death, but i got me a guinea pig at the same time, and, taking the piss out of my sister's bad choice of pet names, called it guffor.
oh, and the rabbit's name got changed to 'stew' after he gnawed thru the mains lead of my megadrive.

*edit - i meant rabbit! goddammit! rabbit!
(Wed 25th Feb 2004, 16:14, More)
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