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Home » Messageboard » What's that lurking at the bottom of the garden? » Message 502426 (Thread)

[challenge entry] What you want for your garden is some...

Metrognomes

From the What's that lurking at the bottom of the garden? challenge. See all 261 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! Kamikazee Killmouse, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:35, archived)
# this comes with added pome wot I wrote...
A score and twenty midgets all sway from side to side
They're gathered in your living room and you've no place to hide;
As the tick-tock of their rhythmic rock recoils from left to right
The swishing of their fishing rods a hypnotising sight

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

They came in through the window while spinning through the air,
Embedding in the carpet and causing you a scare
Now cobra-like they're fixing you with umpteen beady eyes
Percussive perching pendulums with plaster-casted thighs.

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

They should be in a garden, so what they doin' here?
What evil is in store for you? You've such a lot to fear!
And what unruly lunatic unleashed them on the world
To bring them to your living-room with fishing rods unfurled?

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

This mesmerising motion of their metronomic stance
Is surely set to brainwash you into a zombie-trance
Through which the evil genius will have you do his bidding
Well, if he thinks you'll stand for that he must be bloody kidding!

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

It's like some bad 'B' movie but you'll have to save the planet:
You're probably the last soul left on earth unchanged, dagnabbit!
IT'S UP TO YOU to kick them where it hurts; so gnomes en-garde
(But God knows, with concrete testicles it's going to be hard).

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

And then you see the News Report that brings you back from space
It seems that some tornado hit that Texas Homecare place
Amongst the list of missing stuff were fourty garden gnomes
Which must have sucked into the sky and blown in your home.

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock...

And so you greet reality like some far wandered friend,
And laugh at your stupidity for going round the bend;
It really seems implausible - but "truth's as strange as fiction"!
And then you see their leader grin and bounce into the kitchen...
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikazee Killmouse, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:36, archived)
# aaarghh
attack of the evil killer pun gnomes. another cracker, u guys make me larf ;e
(I helped save b3ta! BigFreak thinks that words are fun, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:36, archived)
# that is a most
wonderful picture!
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:37, archived)
# aaand
it's given me an idea which i may or may not be arsed to do tonight :D
(I helped save b3ta! BigFreak thinks that words are fun, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:39, archived)
# That is lovely
.
(I helped save b3ta! curry monster, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:38, archived)
# now THAT is a challenge winner
Superb imagery and punnage all in one.
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:38, archived)
# it's got
my vote - if that ever counted!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:39, archived)
# ta
glad to see that finished to be honest - you woulnae believe the layers and layersets n gnomes n gnomes n...

time for a lie down.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikazee Killmouse, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:45, archived)
# i would!
it's very woo sir!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:52, archived)
# all
worth it. it is superb!
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:23, archived)
# oh god
i love that!

i love love love it!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:38, archived)
# Great pic
and great big poem !! - BOO
(I helped save b3ta! koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:39, archived)
# yay
lovely!
(I helped save b3ta! bananaman, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:40, archived)
# I DON'T LIKE IT...
NOT ONE BIT. I'M SURE IT'S A PARK AND NOT A GARDEN ANYWAY
(GroomyGroomerGroomsGroomingly (but only if you're a baby badger), Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:45, archived)
# lovely,
woo to both.
(I helped save b3ta! iamhyperdog, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 20:47, archived)
# Do you really think that Metrognomes is better than this?


I feel bitter
(GroomyGroomerGroomsGroomingly (but only if you're a baby badger), Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:00, archived)
# YES
that is all
(acme, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:51, archived)
# Gnah superb.
A+, diddle diddle. I'm too lazy to read your poem.
(NotMrHumbolt, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:05, archived)
# Verily, a rock opera!
did I really say verily?
(Blackrock, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:15, archived)
# I'll match your verily
and raise you four-sooth
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikazee Killmouse, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:30, archived)
# John Major
would be proud of you Killmouse
(Mr Ben, Sat 23 Nov 2002, 21:53, archived)
# I've been watching that picture for twenty minuttes now
and I plan to watch it for at least twenty more
(W3stwing, Sun 24 Nov 2002, 4:48, archived)
# Tree
mendous.

Absolutely Top Chop.
(I helped save b3ta! Evil Prof. Pixel Masher I made this!, Sun 24 Nov 2002, 15:38, archived)