Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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once upon a time...I had come back from uni. I went to a friend's house and picked him up and we both decided to go to a communal spot of the kids of that day and have a fag. Upon parking up and sparking up, a mysterious figure appeared at my slightly opened window.
Plod - Hello there chaps, what you up to?
Me - Just smoking a fag...
Plod - (Sniffs) Is that... cannabis i can smell?
Me - (Smirking and generally trying not to laugh at his comedic pronounciation of the word cannabis) No mate, just fags...
He then turned on his handy mag light and looked at the over-filled astray in my clapped out nova, told us that this is where all the druggies hang out (which we also found amusing as it was only our group of friends that hanged out there every night, who never did or saw any people doing drugs there) and promptly walked off.
The fact that my clapped out nova got broke into about a week after that by some druggie, and the police didn't even make an effort with the crime really put the whole thing into perspective, but then... it was only a clapped out nova.
(, Fri 9 Jan 2004, 21:39, Reply)
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