After my mother died...
.. a rather long time ago, my father ended up back on the dating scene. So many years of marriage had dulled his instincts and he ended up with someone who can only be described as a gold-digging whore of the Heather Mills school of gold-digging whoreishness.

To cut a long story short, her true history only really started coming to light after the wedding bells had stopped ringing. She had never worked a day in her life and been married six times before each one terminating with a very generous (to her) divorce settlement. She was a serial wife, verging on professional scam artist.

The inevitable divorce ensued. He made her an offer which, in the context of her past and their very short marriage, was very generous. She however, was determined to get in front of a judge, shed a few tears and rake in the cash, just as she had done many times before.

Then as luck would have it a friend alerted him to something else that was going on. One of her previous marriages had resulted in a child and she was currently involved in a custody dispute. The judge in that case was already particularly unimpressed with her behaviour and was considering granting custody to her ex-husband: details of her latest behaviour could be the straw that broke the camel's back. Well, since she was clearly not fighting fair, my dad decided a little blackmail was in order: accept his settlement or he would go to her ex-husband with information that would lose her the child.

She squirmed, screamed and threatened for a bit, before she finally realised she was defeated. She eventually relented and took the settlement.

I guess it was a case of him breaking his pro mrs.
(Mr T, Wed 8 Dec 2010, 15:19, 6 replies)

Missing feature.
We need a 'I hate this' button.
(speedevil, Wed 8 Dec 2010, 16:19, closed)

SPANG!

( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 8 Dec 2010, 18:13, closed)

Absolutely sublime.
I never even suspected till I read the end. A first class example of the Art of the Spang. Also, fuck you.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Wed 8 Dec 2010, 22:36, closed)

Fucking hell.
Begrudging *click*
( Chum Gnomesky Nom Chompsky, Thu 9 Dec 2010, 11:26, closed)

I clicked...
you bugger.
(SimianKid internet faffer, Thu 9 Dec 2010, 12:07, closed)

Well Played
you cunt
( Snollock Biffer I don't really sniff Bollocks, Thu 9 Dec 2010, 13:25, closed)