As a child/teenager
I was a bit of a geek. (excuse the long rant and lack of funnies)

In my defence I had been to a very inbred primary school, where being clever wasn't just cool, it was a status symbol. And I honestly thought school was about learning stuff. I was clever, too. Faults no 1 & 2 right there.

So I went to a very respectable public girls' school, knowing only one other girl there - Fiona R. Within a week she had cronies, and I was the butt of each and every joke.

Altho (thank god) I was never physically hurt - I was humiliated day after day after day.

The local radio station did an "Everybody Hurts" sad story telling each night at 10.30, and I used to cry myself to sleep to it most nights.

When my lovely mum found out about all this, she went to the school and demanded something be done about it. To be told, wait for it...

"It is not the fault of the girls saying these things to your daughter, Mrs Psyche, it is Psyche's fault for not being socially gifted."

I don't know what her response was, but with 2 other kids, and a demanding husband, I guess as long as I was coping, she was too scared to confront the witches at the school. I was put in a different class the following year.

Roll on 2 years - I was still a geek, but had good friends, the three girls (Fiona R, Nicola S and I can't remember the other girl's name) had bullied a different girl each year, and the one they picked on in third year had parents with connections. Put blankly, they said if the school didn't expel the girls involved, they would go to the press. Girls were duly "asked to leave".

That year I scored the top mark in the (pretty damned good) school for my maths SAT, English end of year exam, and just missed a level 8 for my science SAT. None of my grades were below an A.

We went on some sort of field trip and ended up in a big theatre with a load of other schools, and I saw Fiona R in there. She was fat, ugly, and looked like a total chavvy slapper. I imagine her like that even now. And Fiona R, if you're reading this, I now realise it's because you were a jealous, insecure bitch. But that wouldn't stop me spitting in your face if I saw you now.


All I can say is that I'm happy with who I am now, I'm not afraid of being clever, have a great fella, good life, amazing dreams... Don't know how much more I'd ask for.

OH yeah, and being treated like shit DOES help you realise that treating other people well is hugely important. I now tolerate little crap from others, and *hope* that I treat everyone I meet with respect. Maybe I could've learnt that another way, but I know I'll never forget how it feels to be shat on, and more than that, hope I'll never be the shitter.

As bad as it was to be bullied, at least I'll never have the shame of being the bully.
(Psyche finishes work at the end of June! Yay!!!, Thu 14 May 2009, 17:43, 5 replies)

The "not being socially gifted" thing
was exactly what my Year 7 teacher said to my mum when she decided it was all my parents' fault - not far from the truth, in all honesty - that I was being bullied and had no friends, since I didn't go to school on the bus with the other girls (because I didn't want to - 15 minutes to get home versus an hour) and my mum picked me up from the gates instead.

Fucking bullshit. Bullies are bullies, and will bully regardless of the reasons they have.
( Maladicta, Thu 14 May 2009, 18:46, closed)

wow
A very good, and balanced reply to this weeks qotw.

I've been honoured in the last couple of days to share one of I'm sure many dreams and I'm in awe of how well you coped with such a negative experience in school.

Kudos, psyche!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Thu 14 May 2009, 18:56, closed)

"not socially gifted"
This was one of the things my teachers would put on my report card. I'm with Maladicta on this - it's a load of bull. Rubbish. Codswallop. I swear techers don't like people who don't conform to the social norms, and we all know exactly how the kids react. Being different is a great thing, and nobody should be made to feel like they should conform to be accepted.

You made it through though, and and that is great. What you saw happen to the bully happens to so many of them... they go nowhere. You're here, and I don't think anyone would have you as anything other than how you are.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 14 May 2009, 20:49, closed)

Cheers guys...
Glad a touched a chord. Am training to become a teacher over the next 12 months and I hope my experiences will serve me well to help stop crap like that sort of response.
(Psyche finishes work at the end of June! Yay!!!, Thu 14 May 2009, 22:10, closed)

i do agree with your point about bullying making you more empathis towards others
'tis a good and worthy point
see? take somethign POSITIVE away from the experience and use it to improve yourself! that's what most people don't manage.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Fri 15 May 2009, 20:11, closed)