Antique's Roadshow Soup
Answering the customer phoneline for a supermarket gains you some interesting calls, including the regular shouty, sweary ones, the plain bizzare and once and actual bomb threat (a story for later).

One day, I answered the phone to a very worried old lady who had just bought a tin of oxtail soup.

Me: What is the problem with the soup madam?

Lady: I was just putting my shopping away when I noticed that the date said 5/10 1932. That soup is over seventy years out of date! Can I have my money back?

Me: Are you sure it says that?

Lady: Oooh yes my dear, my dinner is antique!

I spent the next ten minutes explaining that the number wasn't the year, it was just the batch code and that the soup wasn't worth any more than what she'd paid for it. I really felt like I had robbed her of her fifteen minutes of fame and the chance to touch Michael Aspel that day.
(Puddle of Sugar was still wallpapering on, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 13:24, Reply)