Things Stimpy Does Not Get or Understand The Attraction Of
I’m sure many of these have been done before. Here’s my take on them. And it’s sadly not funny.

The Daily Mail, and tabloids in general, and most of the time other newspapers
Why? Newspapers are just that – papers full of news. News on a variety of topics, be it what’s going on in the world, the arts, food, whatever. The tabloids seem though to think their readership needs to be told what to think. I am fed up of going in to my favourite drinking establishment for the partaking of drinking fizzy falling down water only to be treated to the regurgitated outpourings of whatever left or right wing spackers that the paper has hired to flesh out its insubstantial reporting with opinion pieces. I will happily read what is going on, decide if you’re telling the truth about it (and I knew plenty of examples where they are not) and that is all I want you to do. I do not want to be told “This is going to be really bad because of all the pedofiles OMGLOLRZ0R!!!!111!!” I can make that decision myself. Normally, I would live and let live – people can read what they want. But I worry that this is dangerous. News reporters have an insane amount of power, and so many do not seem to treat this power with the respect it deserves. I like to think most people are quite intelligent and they can think for themselves if they believe something is true or not. But a little twisting of the facts, and they can influence people in a massive way. I don’t see the attraction of reading something that has its own pretty clear political agenda, no matter how much they try to deny it to us.

Also, Page 3? No thanks.

Anti-intellectualism
Leading on from the papers. There seems to be a current fad, within media and without, of branding those who work in universities and research establishments as intellectuals living in an ivory tower and completely out of contact with the real world. People being proud of having lived in the same shitty little village all their life, seeing the same people, left school at 14 and never bothering to learn much about the world around them. People who distrust anyone who might think about the world around them, how it could be made better, for themselves of others. People who “don’t hold truck with that reading business”. People proud of the fact they never went to university or any higher education. Fine, if that’s what you want. But why brag about the this. Why are you proud you are uneducated? You’re stuck. You aren’t going anywhere, you’re just going to stagnate. While the rest of us who do put the effort in are going to get all those nice toys you’ve seen on your TV, or even invent some of them, you’re just going to stay rotted in your shitty little place. What is there to be proud of? While I agree, some academics and researchers can be pretty out of touch, most of them are real people just like you, making ends meet and going out and having fun with friends, in general pretty much in touch with and a part of the fabric of life. Rakky and CHCB are two prominent examples on this board, and I’m sure that there are many, many more on here. I’m not going for those who can’t get it. I’m going for those who don’t want it. I just don’t get why not having an education makes you better than those who do, nor do I understand why you want to not have such a thing.

Sex and the City, Big Brother, Friends, E4 - hell, just most TV
Apparantly, being female and in my 20’s, I should love all three of the above mentioned programs. Why? I don’t like going clothes shopping (unless you point me in the direction of Camden), I don’t like watching idiots (as shown above) do nothing then get a big slice of advertising revenue and outside of the The Big Bang Theory the US hasn’t made a funny sitcom in… er… actually, I don’t remember any good ones. E4 I have picked as my target in particular, as it’s full of these things. The rest of television gets it as well, it’s mostly drivel, with the occasional gem. I have only one reason for owning a television and a Sky subscription, and that’s for the film channels, as I tend to get to see things I wouldn’t normally think about. The rest of it I can get on TV catchup services, when I want. Television – it’s boring.

Sport – or more specifically, taking part in the fandom
Football, I’m looking at you here. Why should I care about X team kicking a piece of dead pig in to a fishing net more than Y team? Why should I care when car Z goes around a road 0.001s faster than the rest of the cars? Why is it such a passion? I don’t get it, in the slightest. Athletes pushing themselves to their limits, getting better and better, the teamwork involved in some of these, the technological improvements that some of these sports bring. These are all good. But why do people have to get so rabid about it? Is it some sort of wanting to belong to an extended family? If the money that was involved put in other directions, like the sciences, I could be writing this just by thinking to my computer. Sports fandom, I just don’t get it.

Russell Brand
Not funny, not attractive. A big mouthed charismatic LIAR. IS NOT FUNNY.

Taking the piss out of people who might be just that little bit different
I’m not exactly the most stereotypically normal girl. What sparked this off is that I read a lot of T-girl blogs, and a recurring theme is the abuse they get. Why is it funny to point out that someone is a bit different to you? Why do we take the piss out of the religious people who are in every other way just like everyone else, just they believe in a person in the sky and spend some time worshipping them. I’m not on about the ones who shove it down your throat, they can fuck off. But why is abusing someone because they are slightly different to you funny? Is it because you’re scared of them? I’m not. They’re a different person, and the differences are interesting.

Mac/PC, PS3 vs Xbox 360 – fandom redux
So someone likes a different system to you. So what? They all have their merits, else why would they be selling like they do? It’s no reason to take a person apart about it. I can’t stand MacOS, yet I won’t stop someone using it if that’s what they want. Getting all rabid about something that nobody who’s actually involved with it will give a flying damn about, it’s pointless. This is actually making football fans start to make sense – at least the players acknowledge and thank the fans for their support.

It’s a good source of amusement though, particularly the games consoles one. Just head to any biggish gaming website, pick a time when you know the American kids will be at home and troll. You could probably make a drinking game out of it, with different drinks taken for the different stereotypical insults – your mum, questioning of sexuality and Jew insults being among the most popular. Try it some time.

Amaretto
It’s just horrible.

Gossip mags
People famous for being famous. Well, you’re not in my world. I don’t who “Chanelle” or “David” or “Sir Wibblesteen the II” is. I don’t know what their wearing, nor do I care that they got their tits out at yet another vacuous nightclub. The only way they can get support is through these badly written magazines, full of pictures and articles telling you what you should be doing RIGHT NOW to be more like these idols who are just so perfect. Plus there are my two favourite sections – “True Stories” (they’re not, they could make the tabloids look like bastions of fine reporting and the Truth) and “What men REALLY think about” (again, lies. My boys want through one of the sections and were hysterical at some of the things in there. If you want to find out what a male thinks, ask one). Appealing to the lowest common denominator, I don’t understand why anyone would want to read one, if you can call it reading.

Pink
I wish I was colourblind so I wouldn’t have to see this horrible colour.

Porn stars
Oh my. Fake titted, long nailed (OUCH!), over made up tramps with a clunge the size of Jade Goody’s rotting pie hole. How on earth can anyone find these… things attractive. I’ve had some fun time with my lady friends, true, but not once have I ever heard them emitting the moans and gasps that I’ve heard coming out of these munters mouths.

Then there are the men. Hairy, ugly, overweight. Or toned, fake tanned and equally slipping away. Both coming out with utter rubbish from their mouths, doing the most stupid things (I don’t particularly like having my cheeks slapped with a cock, why would you want to do it?) in the name of erotic entertainment.

Give me some decent amateur porn any day, where the people look like actual people. At least you could imagine you’re there with more pleasure

Clubbing, and the people therein
It’s expensive. It smells. The music is shit. And the people seem to be doing their damned best to look like the porn stars.

The military
I’m not saying get rid of it. I just don’t understand it. I don’t see why I should hero worship people who are going and doing things I don’t agree with. Yes, they have some shocking conditions to live with and they work bloody hard. But it’s pointless hardship. They don’t need to be going and doing those things, and nor do they need to be protected and coddled how they are.

/talk
I’ve tried. But I still don’t understand why /talk is amusing or superior to anything else.
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:20, 19 replies)

Now why can't more women be like you?
/Pandering.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:24, closed)

Do you do children's parties?
Some nice points there, mostly agreed on. Some I'd have to take you to task on if I'd had a couple, but none the less a well put arguement.

You get a click for pink though!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:37, closed)

Feel free to take me to task :)
I haven't exactly put a balanced view point up there, and I was a little rushed in typing it so couldn't get out exactly what I wanted to say. I like to hear the other side of things... even if it reinforces why I don't like or don't get bits!
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:51, closed)

Well since you ask,
I'm an adrenaline addict. I can turn it on or off at will now so when I'm after a buzz Oh, here we go! That kind of explains motor racing. I know how fun and difficult it can be (on a motorcycle at least) so can enjoy it by association.
Amaretto is a bit like chocolate for me. I can leave it alone for as long as needed, but then binge till I have to leave it alone again! It's lovely in a now and again way.
This has to be the weakest debate from me in a long time.
Don't get me wrong, you're quite correct on your points and your point of view, and I like the way you've put your points across. It's fun to play devil's advocate sometimes no?
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:07, closed)

Fair enough
I can understand it if you've taken part. I just don't get the same feeling... never enjoyed playing them, so I don't enjoy watching I guess.

The only thing that gets close is watching WRC... I'm a nervous passenger at the best of times, so it does set me on edge a bit!
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:15, closed)

But here comes my admission;
I don't know what /talk is
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:20, closed)

Top of the page
Just under where it says qotw in big white letter, click the link for the Talk Board. Enter at your own risk.
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:22, closed)

D'oh
Yes, I went there once.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:33, closed)

Click
agree with every single thing you wrote. It's an interesting feeling, not having a point to disagree on. Especially the porn-stars and expecting 20 something girls to be brainless and boring
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:41, closed)

I'd agree with about half
*click* for the effort though! :)
(Galahad is out of his gourd on yellow bentines, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:56, closed)

This must be said...
I'm also a girl about the same age as you, and agree with you on almost everything there except for one thing (and you're not the only person to do this) - Why, when saying that all TV from America is crap, does everyone forget Frasier? That was great.

But you're totally right, Amaretto and pink are shit.

That is all.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 16 Oct 2009, 10:58, closed)

Frasier - boring
I nearly fell asleep watching it. It's not just american comedy - there is a lot of British comedy I can't stand either. The Office is a good one, I don't like it from either side of the atlantic.

The US has produced some brilliant TV though - Battlestar Galactica is the first one that comes to my mind.
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:11, closed)

The military?
'Protected and coddled'.... What an interesting little planet you must live on..
(Senora Veranos cannot and will not so ner..., Fri 16 Oct 2009, 11:59, closed)

Exactly
And it's logical fallacy to say "I don't support the war in xyz therefore why should I praise our soldiers, they don't need to be there".

They don't know which war they are going to be fighting when they sign-up.

They carry out the will of the leaders which we elect. Today's war may be unpalatable, but tomorrow's may be altrustic defence.

Of course they hope to grow and receive reward, but it requires courage and the knowledge that there's a good chance you might die in pain -- which isn't really the same if you're an IT consultant. It's got to be worthy of some respect for the simple reason that not everyone has the qualities to be able to do it. I know I certainly couldn't.
(Super Jet Shoes, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 12:22, closed)

Two things prompted me to write the bit about the military
1) The soldier who came home from some deployment and raped his wife. She went and told the sergent, he said he'd sort it all out. Nothing happened. Police wouldn't do anything as he's in the Army. Army didn't want to know.

2) The five pissed up sailors who tried to smash up my local pub when we didn't bow down at their feet and they were refused free drinks. Again - try getting the army or police to do anything.

Thats what I mean by protected and coddled. Out on deployment - I am under no delusion, it's fucking grim. But back here, they are very well protected. I agree, it's a hard job, one that entails a lot of pain. But they didn't have to sign up. It was their choice, and not one I feel worthy of the mindless admiration for making, and certainly I don't feel it gives them the right to behave however they feel.

I am not saying get rid of the military, by any means (although I would love to see the day when we can). They are sadly still needed. I just don't understand what's so wonderous about it all.
(stimpy, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 12:45, closed)

pink
vile colour.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 14:25, closed)

Yank trollage..
1 shot for mentioning the term 'douchebag'

You'd be rat-arsed within minutes..
(danniekavanagh did nothing constructive on, Fri 16 Oct 2009, 18:19, closed)

I was with you up until 'Amaretto'
I love them.
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Sun 18 Oct 2009, 16:25, closed)

Click
I agree with everything except Amaretto. I love that stuff. Preferably over ice and muddled strawberries.
(misskitty reeks of sex and turpentine; laudanum afternoons, Wed 21 Oct 2009, 22:57, closed)