Crazy Relativescurvylittlegoth writes, "My Grandma is crazy, crazy mad. As well as regularly putting curses on us all, she once fell asleep in the armchair on a sunny afternoon, Barley Wine in one hand, Peter Stuyveson in the other, only to wake up several hours later to a Darth Vader sounding fireman. She thought she was in HELL as the smoke and flames billowed round her..."
Are any of your relatives this loopy?
(
chthonic, Thu 5 Jul 2007, 15:59)
« Go Back
my family...... are completely stark raving bonkers. Some examples...
- My grandfather, John, had a brother called... John. Apparantly the story was that neighbours of the family died in an accident and their son was adopted as a baby by my family, but they never bothered to change his name.
- My great-grandfather managed to change the family name from Kyle to Coyle. He was absolutely guttered when he registered my Grandfather's birth and the priest couldn't make out what he was saying... so started the only line of Coyles in the family.
- The family are very musical, yet my grandfather is the only person I've ever known to play the accordian upside down and not find anything unusual about it.
- He was not the most quick witted either... after a good hour and a half of bantering back and forth with "cunny funt", "pucking fiss" and whatnot, he FINALLY worked out what we were on about and came out with the now legendary "aye, and I suppose you think thats fucking funny"... then couldn't understand why everyone was pissing themselves laughing.
My own mum is now starting to go skatty in the head and some gems from her recently include...
- Me asking for a fork to eat my dinner with when I was presented with two knifes and a teaspoon. I was handed another knife.
- Stating that one of the kids were out on the street playing "with one of those things that you put between your legs". Utterly bemused by this statement I asked for more details and she replied, "what do you call it... not a cock... no, was it a cock?"... until pointing out the window as said child goes past... on a pedal gokart.
- She burnt the mashed potatos for last week's roast beef by putting them in the oven with the roast beef, thinking it would save her time on keeping the potatos warm until deal or no deal was finished. Fair enough... except it was Friday's Deal or No Deal on VHS.
- She thinks I drive too fast in town (25-30mph), yet too slow on the motorway (normally 80-90mph). And she's afraid of country roads cos she "doesn't known where she is".
It worries my that I'm already showing traces of this mentality.
(, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 23:09, Reply)
« Go Back