I used to work for a Member of Parliament...
...and it's a cracking job, apart from dealing with the constituents. Yes you, the taxpayers who seem to think that your MP should be at your beck and call 24/7, and be willing and able to move heaven and earth for you because your neighbour's hedge is blocking your sunlight.

No, just no. That's not what the MP is there for, and it's certainly not what muggins here gets paid to deal with (and paid diddly squat because you Daily Mail readers complain bitterly about MP's expenses).

There are priorities. The woman whose daughter is trapped in Beirut during the start of the war in Lebanon, I'll spend half a day on the phone to the Foreign Office for. The pensioner whose credits have gone completely up the spout and is struggling with his money, I'll do my best to fast-track a solution for.

But not for people like this:

Me: "Good morning, office of *****"
Woman: "I'd like to speak to **** please"
Me: "I'm afraid he's not in the office right now, can I help at all?" (true)
Woman: "Well where is he?"
Me: "He's in a meeting, can I..."
Woman: "What meeting? When will he be back? I want to speak to him"
Me: "He's in a committee meeting, then he's going into the Chamber. Look, can I help at all?" (nearly true - he's meeting an ambassador afterwards, I don't know when he'll be back, but damned if I'm telling her that)
Woman: "That's not good enough"
Me: "Look, if you tell me what the issue is I'll see what I can do for you, and get him to call you when he's back in the office"
Woman: "You're just fobbing me off!"
Me: "If he was here, you could speak to him, but he isn't. Can I find out what it's about and..."
Woman: "It's all a big con. All you do is lie to us. I'll never vote for you again..." (I bet she never did in the first place)

This goes back and forth for 5mins or more until she eventually gives up. I get a name out of her, but she won't tell me what it's about and won't give me an address or a phone number - so how am I supposed to get my boss in touch with her? Useless.

You think customers are bad? Try constituents. They take a self-righteousness to a whole different level.
(annexed, Mon 8 Sep 2008, 14:12, 3 replies)

You have my sympathy
Belated as it may be ... I get constantly threatened with "I'm calling my MP about you. He/she will have your job." Frankly, they'd be bloody welcome to it!
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Mon 8 Sep 2008, 14:39, closed)

I've contacted my MP once or twice
The first time, the letter was signed in nice fountain pen.

The last time, I'd been downgraded to Biro.

Was it something I said?

Eds PJM you forgot completely fooking massive final salary pension scheme. And mine's 'in' but has a majority the size of a weasel's winkie so needs to be nice to the proles.
(osok Rebel without a clue, Mon 8 Sep 2008, 14:49, closed)

I've contacted my MP too
He's actually been quite good, putting my concern directly to the minister reponsible.

I ended up getting a copy of the minister's letter with a handwritten note applied too.

If only we could guarantee that they'd listen to us when not in opposition then it might begin to justifty their hilarious salaries and expenses.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 8 Sep 2008, 14:54, closed)