Beautiful Days 2007...
...and it fucked it down the whole weekend. Come Sunday night, the entire site was knee-deep in claggy, slidey mud. The view from the top of the main stage field looked like a zombie movie filmed in a cesspit, as a few thousand pissed, stoned and bedraggled festy-goers schlopped their way round the site.

It was aces though. I'm pretty sure everyone had a good time. Well, except for the girl I spotted late on Sunday evening.

The Levellers were closing the festival, in traditional style. Halfway through their set the umpty-three pints of Suicider I'd ingested throughout the day were clamouring for some space of their own, so off I slid to the bogs. In the light of strobes and fireworks, I noticed a small crowd gathered round one of the shitboxes. So, naturally, I wanted to get myself a better look. I mean, it could have been anything.

In the dim glow, I could make out the slumped figure of a girl, her friends gathered round attempting to rouse her. A horrified-looking paramedic looked on, hurriedly snapping on an industrial grade pair of elbow-length rubber gloves.

Poor poorly girl, I thought, as I skipped off to the other end of the queue to wait patiently for a slash. I wonder if they'll have to hose her off or something?

Bearing in mind the cumulative effect of rain, mud, beer and festival food, I'm pretty sure that kneeling in one of the turdis cubicles with head gently resting on the mounded contents of the pot wouldn't have been top of her 'preferred places to be' list.

Still. At least it wasn't me.
(surlygirl spanked your monkey on, Fri 5 Jun 2009, 13:33, 2 replies)

Dear god
A pile of shit for a pillow...
( chart cat has an itch, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 8:05, closed)

truly horrible.
i mean, i've woken up in some pretty bad places, but that surely had to take the (arse)biscuit...
(surlygirl spanked your monkey on, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 19:25, closed)