First rude thing I saw? I didn't see it. But I felt it.
TL:DR I got Fondled as kid, but Karma paid him back.

I had a wonderful childhood, both my parents loved me very much, we weren't too poor, but not well off enough to be snobs. All in all I was very sheltered, and a happy boy.

One New years day, my oldest cousin brought her new boyfriend around to meet the family, she had always been a bit of a problem, but my Mum was like a mum to her, as she'd fallen out with her own parents and gotten into bad crowds. Anyway, her new boyfriend was quite a bit older than her, i'd guess around 15 years older than her, and she was 17 at the time, I was nearly 8.
Anyway, everyone was sat in the garden, grownups having a friendly drink, me and my sisters playing when I went into the house to go to the toilet. As I was leaving the bathroom, I met the boyfriend in the hallway landing. He pulled me into a side room and held me by the back of my neck on the bed. As I said before, I was very sheltered and a good kid, so I kind of just went into shock and rigid. He pulled my shorts down, all the while pinning my face into the pillow, and grabbed my balls with his hand and fondled them. I'm not sure if something disturbed him or he lost his nerve, but after a moment or so of this, he leaned into my ear and said, if I tell anyone what had happened he'd kill [Cousins name] and my parents.

I stayed there a few minutes after he left, by the time I'd sneaked back to the garden, he and my cousin had left.
I planned to tell my parents about it, but Karma did my work for me. He had his head physically removed in a motorbike accident less than a month later. I like to think my hatred of him did it, which I know is ridiculous, but I'm not bitter about it. The Prick.
P.S. His sudden death meant that my Cousin will always remember him fondly, and was depressed for several years later. But is now married and happy to a nice guy with a kid form a previous marriage. Everyone ended up happy!
( Anal_Volley_Net, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 23:25, 5 replies)

I guess you'll always remember him fondly too.
sorry
( krang, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 23:54, closed)

HEYOOOOO
CRIPPLING CHILDHOOD MEMORY PUNS ARE THE BEST KIND!
( Anal_Volley_Net, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 23:56, closed)

I was wondering if I'd overstepped the mark a bit
but then I remembered that this is b3ta.
( krang, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 23:58, closed)

No
your mum
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 0:26, closed)

*pun about head
justice
(Monkeystrumpet monkey. Monkey, MONKEY!!!, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 9:26, closed)