Advanced Tongue Simulator
When we went shopping, my sister would get the usual teen girl magazines. Cosmo. Dolly. Girlfriend. You know they kind, with advice, quizzes and agony aunts. She'd never pay much attention to groceries, that was something mum did.

As you do, I'd read the magazines. Especially the more racy bits like the sex advice. Once there was this article about how you could use bananas as a training aid to become really good at tongue kissing.

Well I pretty quickly figured out this was why she was so enthusiastic about fruit shopping the following week. I looked on with silent amusement as she picked out a big, firm hand of larger than usual bananas.

The following morning, no-one could figure out why she was going completely ape-shit, accusing me of being a prick, but refusing to say why. During the night I'd put neat printed labels on each banana, "Advanced Tongue Simulator".

Sibling button pushing had succeeded beyond my wildest dreams.
(xixax, Fri 7 Aug 2009, 11:35, 1 reply)

Did they smell curiously fishy?

( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Fri 7 Aug 2009, 23:08, closed)