The Voice Of Experience (O RLY?)
I've been doing this for almost 10 years now, and I've learned a few things along the way:

1) Communication is paramount. Talk to each other. Don't assume: ask. If you think someone's doing something weird, ask about it.

2) People are different. They see different things, and do different things, to different schedules. Don't lose your rag if you spot mushrooms growing behind the bathtub (which really happened to me): sort it. How can they miss that? Isn't it obviously a problem? Well, yes, other people can miss things that are blindingly obvious to you - and vice versa.

3) Use English, or another common language. Don't drop hints or leave "signs": they will get missed. The only way you can be sure someone gets the message you want them to get is to tell them plainly.

4) Your flatmates are (usually) on your side. They're paying rent too. I know there are wackos, and I've met a few of those, but I've also been seen as a wacko, when I was anything but. (I did something the others didn't immediately understand, and they assumed the worst, rather than simply ask me about it.)
( bnt what, me worry?, Sun 1 Mar 2009, 23:27, 2 replies)

well put
you, my friend, should be a marriage counsellor.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 3:02, closed)

some folk really dont appreciate honesty
Lad I worked with moved in recently. He had been hanging round the gaf with me watching football and the like for months before so was well used to my meticulous ways.

I took your approach after a couple of weeks of picking up after him and asked that he would make a habit of picking up after himself etc.

He told me where to go.

So I simply withdrew the things I otherwise made readily available like a SKY sports subscription, internet access, a constant supply of tea/coffee/milk/sugar and various meals for two instead of one.

He figured it out and has been the very model ever since.

There's a new person moving in this week. The house is spotless. Hopefully the message will be received loud and clear.

rafter
baz
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 9:43, closed)