it is a vile habit
only when you give up properly do you realise how vile it is. to people who don't smoke, people who do smell/taste disgusting. even if you've cleaned your teeth or whatever, it clings to your hair, your fingers (esp if you smoke cheap rollies), your breath... when you do give up, you'll jump right on this bandwagon, because the smell IS FUCKING AWFUL.

i never smoked because my grandma got gangrene in her foot from smoking. the doctor amputated her toe and told her to quit. she said she was 70 and she would do what she liked. he said very good, and he looked forward to seeing her next year to take off the rest of her leg. she quit. believe me, there is nothing like seeing an old lady's 4-toed foot to put a kid off smoking...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:46, 1 reply)

or i could make you cry like i made monty cry
by picturing a conversation between your mrs and your daughter, when your daughter is asking when daddy is coming home, and mummy is explaining what bronchioloalveolar carcinoma means....
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:48, closed)

Does it mean sexy bumfun time?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:50, closed)

what doesn't mean that to you?!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:51, closed)

YOUR SON IS DEAD!
MR KIRK, DO YOU HAVE A SON NAMED ROBERT KIRK, AGED 17?

YOUR SON IS DEAD!

What a lovely old hymn that was.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:57, closed)

Takes me back.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 13:10, closed)

OUCH. OUCH. OUCH.
Please remind me of this post over the next few days.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 12:52, closed)

In Battered's case the story will go
Daughter: "When's daddy coming home?"
Mum: "He's standing right in front of you. Look down. Come on now, this stopped being funny when you were seven. Show your dad some respect"
( Kroney, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 13:12, closed)

haha.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 13:17, closed)