I like this one
I know some of them are made up, but some are ace...
I decided to rasie money for charity by taking part in a 10k hill race, and not being a natural runner (drink beer, smoke recreational tobacco yadda yadda) i needed to train a lot. I actually got quite good, lost a stack of weight and so on. All that friction over the course of 4 months of hard distance training chafed my nipples until they were finally like little hard bullets of scabbiness. Like grazing yourself in the same place over and over again. What I didnt count on was running the race and coming in all bug eyed with adrenalin, couldn't work out why people were pointing at me agape. Once the endorphin rush wore off, realised my nipples had both been rubbed off completely, effectively now just scabs they had been well and truly picked, and my white microfibre running vest was a very fetching shade of abbatoir. That really really hurt, and took forever for me to be able to get in a warm shower, tight tshirt etc. Very very hurty.
Worse, I bagged a girl about 3 months later, and she gets all playful and bites one of my freshly grown man buttons, which promptly came away in her teeth. I screamed louder than she did.
(kaptinkurtz, Fri 14 Jul 2006, 16:48, Reply)