Childcare gone wrong
My sister is the anxious, controlling type (and is a bit on the stuffy side), so it took a good few years for me to convince her that maybe, just maybe, I was trustworthy enough to look after her daughter for brief periods of time - like changing her nappy whilst my sister was on the phone in the next room.

Anyway, my niece was about three, and I'd been finally trusted on my own with her for a few precious moments at a family get-together, whilst my sister and her husband had gone to fetch drinks. My niece is excited about her juice. At this stage, it is worth pointing out, any drink that is not water or milk, is juice, and is terribly exciting, and highly desirable.

She's talking about her juice:

'my juice'
'yes, your juice'
'I have orange juice'
'yes, orange juice is nice'
'all gone'
'good girl, more juice later'

The usual exciting exchanges ... It's at this point that she spots my beer. Or juice as she likes to call it. Hey, I can get on board with this mentality, they do share a lot of similar qualities ...

'More juice' (pointing at my pint glass)
'No, this is my juice'
'I have your juice'
'No, this is special juice'
'Children's juice that you like?'

It is at this point that my sister returns. Having heard none of the previous conversation. And that I utter the immortal line:

'No, I like lady juice'


Why do these things come out of my mouth!
(cherrynicola, Sun 15 Jun 2008, 3:11, 1 reply)

well played!
you filthy monkey!!
click x
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 15 Jun 2008, 11:56, closed)