Irrational HatredPeople who say "less" when they mean "fewer" ought to be turned into soup, the soup fed to baboons and the baboons fired into an active volcano. What has you grinding your teeth with rage, and why?
Suggested by Smash Monkey
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 31 Mar 2011, 14:36)
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People who eat noisy things at the moviesI still don't understand how the mindless eating of crap enhances the theatregoing experience. The stuff on sale is revolting, it costs 796% of the average retail price, and it's all either incredibly crunchy and noisy, or wrapped in something incredibly crunchy and noisy. I didn't pay the price of a ticket to listen to you perpetually grazing fucktards mumbling your way through a cellophane bag of shrapnel.
First to die in the righteous purge will be those who deliberately WAIT through the adverts and previews, and then giddily unwrap their choc-top or whatever just as the main feature begins. They've been teasing themselves, you see... teasing and torturing themselves, and now comes the reward for their infinite patience and abstemious longsuffering. You'll get to hear this particular type of quasi-bulimic twat consuming the cacophonous sweetmeat with excruciating, almost pornographic, slowness and care for a full half of your film.
(, Sat 2 Apr 2011, 9:12, 1 reply)
Oh that's but one...Specifically: eating anything noisier than a soft roll with no filling.
All cinema-goers should be tested on the Wittertainment Code of Conduct before being allowed into a movie theatre:
www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/markkermode/2010/12/the_moviegoers_code_of_conduct.html
As the Code says: Nachos cause particular offense and are of the devil
(, Sun 3 Apr 2011, 20:37, closed)
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