Why I was late"On the way to the station, I got hit by a bat, it almost took my head clean off. Then the machine would not accept my ticket and the guy at the gate didn't think I looked like the photo on my travel card. So I had to go home and get my passport.
Then the train was 45 minutes late to the station because of the dangerous badger threat at Carpenters Park.
When I was on the train it took and hour and a half to get past the biscuit factory because the driver was really fat.
Then there was a delay stopping at the station because the train in front had heard we were coming and decided to play a practical joke with a rubber shoe on the track.
That is why I couldn't get here on time today."
What's your best excuse?
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chthonic, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 10:36)
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Err, what?I worked with a guy for more than two years who it would be fair to say wasn't the quickest of guys. His explanations of being late or missing work altogether seemed, in his mind, to make perfect sense. The rest of us were never so sure.
Example 1:
Him: "I'm late because my mum was hearing things."
Example 2:
Him: "I wont be in work today unless you come round my house?"
Boss: "What?"
Him: "I've locked myself in my toilet and I need someone to come and open it for me."
Boss: "But the lock's on the inside, isn't it?"
Him: "Yes but I can't remember where I left my key."
Example 3:
Him: "I don't think I can come to work today, I have no front door."
Example 4:
Me: "Why are you late?"
Him: "Yesterday the manager said I smell."
Other such excuses were "I was on the phone", "My mum wants me to go to Iceland", "this girl keeps sending me pictures", etc... etc... etc... 'Blithering idiot' doesn't do him justice.
Length? Suitable for pole vaulting.
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Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 16:05,
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