Almost everything but especially...
As this is my 1st ever B3TA post I’ll keep it brief or else I may start foaming at the mouth and fall over backwards:

Boris Johnson
How the fucking hell did this motherfucking cunting fuckwit manage to get elected Mayor of London? I am unable to see a single laudable quality that the man possesses. I am unfortunate enough to know people who voted for him because “he’s funny”, but is that a basis for electing someone to a position of power? He’s just another in a long line of posh tossbags who under no circumstances should be allowed into positions of authority. Actually while I’m here why not just extend this to all politicians, I think by definition anyone who wants to be a politician should under no circumstances be allowed to, bunch of twunts the lot of them.

Scooters
Gay? Tosser? Too scared to ride a real motorbike? Why not buy a 50cc scooter and spend your time annoying every other road user. There was a time when this could be restricted to pizza delivery pricks, unfortunately now every chavvy little wanker rides around on a machine that sounds like a wasp with anger management issues. And to make matters worse some of the little fuckers actually try and “Mod” them with neon lights et al, like you don’t look like enough of a cunt when riding one? And don’t even get me started on the way they ride them, I realise there are always exceptions to the rule but as a result of the minimal training required to ride one, the majority of them are a danger to themselves and everyone else. That said, I can’t help feeling a sense of grim satisfaction when I see one of them get wiped out by a car that they failed to give way to because it disputed their ownership of the road… Little fuckers
(redrewmac *Insert witty comment here*, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:29, 17 replies)

Just read this:
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/7387113.stm

Not happy about that cunt, not at all.
( Cawl, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:31, closed)

You are so right about the scooters
When I was that age you would never dream of being such a girlie and have a scooter.. it was a yamaha FS1E for me.. at least it looked like a motorbike and didnt sound like a wasp!
(scowners shagged his mum on, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:32, closed)

Someone got out on the wrong side of the bed...
That being said, RE:Boris, you answered your own question:

"He’s just another in a long line of posh tossbags who under no circumstances should be allowed into positions of authority."

Correct but he is the lesser evil as far as i see it. He's getting rid of bendy busses, that can't be all bad. I hate those damn things.

edit: Koal, i think you're awesome, but i totally disagree with you on that point. So many fucktards (chav's mainly) disrupt my journey on the tube / bus / overground trains because of this. I had to travel home from work with this woman puking all over herself, and then drinking MORE beer.
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:33, closed)

Election Pledges..
Wait a sec, he's a cunt because he's in the process of making good one of his election promises, one of the very reasons he got voted in?

I don't understand why that makes someone angry?
(Horgy, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:41, closed)

@Axai
Thanks :D

I don't live in London, but I often travel there with friends, from Epping on the Central Line to go to gigs.

We tend to have a couple of drinks on the way (whoever isn't driving), to start the evening off nicely, and to save a fair few pounds once we actually get there.

We're neither drunk, nor disorderly.

It's a fucking pain in the arse that a bunch of idiots who insist on vomiting over themselves ruin it for the rest of us.

It'd be better to fine people who're a drunk, vomiting mess.
( Cawl, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:41, closed)

.
Oh I don't know the scooter kids occasionally have their moments like the ones I saw a few weeks back riding with linked arms in formation. Made me laugh... but yes proper bikes, so much more sensible I agree.
(cmouse is pondering about life in other jobs, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:43, closed)

@Axai
he isn't actually going to get rid of bendy buses though is he. He pledged to bring back routemasters, but the cost of the vehicles would be astronomical coupled with the fact that no one will insure a bus company to drive a vehicle with a hole in the back.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:48, closed)

@Koal
You have a good point.
It's a shame that the retards amongst us spoil it for the rest of us. It really is.

If it wasn't for the fucktard terrorists i'd still be able to take whatever i want onto the plane.

I understand there are vast amounts more of intelligent, sensible people but unfortunately the number of those who aren't are growing and something needs to be done about it.

As someone pointed out earlier, why can the rest of the world not see it as we do?

;)

edit: @geordie It was just a little jibe. I actually like his policies and hope he can at least fix some of the problems that labour created. I'm not saying he will, but it seems promising. Labour are far too hippy for me.
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:48, closed)

Boris Johnson - why?
Because Comrade Ken took far too many liberties with public money, persecuted too many motorists and treated London like it was his own personal kingdom.

It's kneejerk, reactionary voting and is exactly what happens when the party in power stonewalls the electorate.

When the electorate is stonewalled and feels disenfranchised, they'll start to embrace extremist politics. Amazingly, it's taken eleven years for the Labour party to realise this.

Right now, given the choice of a vote for Ken/Gordon and a vote for Boris/David there would be no way in a millions years that Labour would get my X.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 7 May 2008, 12:54, closed)

@ Axai
"why can the rest of the world not see it as we do?"

Because we're the 95th percentile on the bell-curve of fantastic-ness.

It's Kaol, by the way :p
( Cawl, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:54, closed)

Not sure I ever get out of bed on the right side tbh :(
I'm quite prepared to admit that I may have an irrational hatred of Boris, he just makes my blood boil, he could be the best Mayor ever but I'd still think he was a cunt. This is not to say I am a particular fan of any of the other candidates, picking someone to vote for is a whole other issue…

For the record I genuinely apologise if my views offend anyone’s political sensibilities, that was not my aim, it was just a 'therapeutic' little vent to help get me through another Wednesday.
(redrewmac *Insert witty comment here*, Wed 7 May 2008, 12:55, closed)

im actually quite interested to see how this boris thing pans out...
i reckon he could do alright, and i hate the Torys.

The Alcohol on the train thing is a good idea.
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Wed 7 May 2008, 13:04, closed)

@redrewmac
Yeah! How DARE `the people' vote for who they want.

Shouldn't be allowed!
(Audax Victor, Wed 7 May 2008, 13:04, closed)

@redrewmac
Dont worry dude... the one you gotta watch out for is Humpty! (Just kidding Humpty, please don't kill me)...

@Kaol too true. It's a shame really, well happy drinking on the tube until they ban it! (And kick a chav too, because they're the one that spolit it.)

@PJM Couldn't have said it better myself!
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Wed 7 May 2008, 13:05, closed)

Miss! Miss! I know!
1) Ken Livingstone
2) mods (as in mods, not modifications) were/are cool
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 May 2008, 13:17, closed)

@dan dan dan
What about when they decide to stop drunk people getting on at all?

The problem isn't people drinking on the tube, it's drunk people being on the tube
( Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Wed 7 May 2008, 13:22, closed)

ok, here goes...
1. Boris got voted in because he offered something that any politician who has been in power (and run London like it was his personal property) already for over 20 fucking years on-and-off cannot offer. Hope. Hope that it doesn't have to be like this. Hope that we can be united instead of divided. Hope that we can be listened to and considered instead of being ridden roughshod over. Hope that a stop might be put to some of the most blatant corruption and sleaze since ther 1970s. Anyone who gets a classics degree from Oxford cannot be too unintelligent. His self-effacing and humourous manner cannot be taken as indicative of stupidity or ineffectiveness. When he has a job to get on with Boris so far appears to concentrate on doing it well. He may not be able to please everybody but neither is he a vindictive self-important shit who has waged a personal vendetta against the hardworking tax-paying middle class army who actually make up most of London. People are tired of that, and in Boris they see a politician who may, just perhaps, try to keep his promises, serve his public humbly and faithfully, and work to earn their trust and respect.

He may not turn out to have done all that in 4 years time, but there is now the hope that he may. Ken had nothing to offer except more misery and corruption. In my opinion, it's never better the devil you know.

2. Scooters. Things that are 50cc are mopeds amnd they are ridden by a)16 year olds who cannot ride a bigger bike, and b)car drivers who do not want to do any bike training. Both in my opinion, are a fucking menace and should be legislated off the roads. I think you can still get a 50cc Aprilia RS which looks like a proper bike, but it is a bloody joke. heavy and hard to ride like a grown up sportsbike, but with a stupid little 50cc engine. I piss myself every time I come up to the lights on my proper bike and some little child is revving the nuts off their farty Aprilia. I wonder if they feel as much of a tit as they look when they are a tiny speck in my rear-view mirror?

But proper plastic-free vintage scooters with gears are cool. Quite apart from the mod image, which will always be cooler than the rocker image by dint of the suits, hair, music and girls it involved, the damn things are just so much fun to ride. I've ridden motorbikes for years but I have never been on one that handles anything like as well as my first Vespa 125 Primavera. They are more fun to ride around town than anything, period. Plus they look so cool and chicks dig them. If they didn't need fixing constantly I'd still ride one.

I don't get this thing of calling scooters gay either. Well, not if motorbikes are held up in copmparison as straight. Motorbikes are almost always ridden by men, who go out in groups together dressed in skin-tight brightly coloured leather leotards and drink nothing but orange juice. And then there's those Harley Davidsons all dressed up in black leather, studs and tassles...
(Lambkin, Wed 7 May 2008, 22:29, closed)