Shame
Some people get off on the exhibitionism, but this was pure lust. I'm not proud, but I did once have sex on Portsmouth beach at 2am in the fog. I got a nasty cold, shingle _everywhere_ and have never, ever gone back to Portsmouth. The shame.
There are things you boast about, and then there's Portsmouth beach... what are you ashamed of having done?
( , Thu 24 Nov 2005, 17:16)
Some people get off on the exhibitionism, but this was pure lust. I'm not proud, but I did once have sex on Portsmouth beach at 2am in the fog. I got a nasty cold, shingle _everywhere_ and have never, ever gone back to Portsmouth. The shame.
There are things you boast about, and then there's Portsmouth beach... what are you ashamed of having done?
( , Thu 24 Nov 2005, 17:16)
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Faecal Graffiti
WARNING: This is pretty foul.
Whilst studying at Brighton Uni I found myself in the 'Market Diner', a 24 filth hole of a cafe with a staff consisting of 15 year old proto rapists and greasy-haired old hags. It was about 4.00am, I was very drunk.
I had been there many times before and been a lot drunker, but something was different this time.
After finishing my egg and sausage sandwich, I made my excuses to my friends and staggered to the toilets. After a good long drunken piss, something caught my eye; the toilet brush.
In my drunken haze I thought it might be a laugh to check if there was any poo on the end. There was. My actions from this point on are worthy of both revulsion and worship in equal measure; both the greatest and the most terrible thing I have ever done at the same time.
I took the soiled brush and wrote on the tiled wall in foot high letters, as carefully as I could: CLEAN ME
Whenever I look back on this incident, I always try to imagine the expression on the member of staffs face who went in there on a routine toilet roll check and found my dirty, stinking protest.
Can something be both unimaginably foul and breathtakingly beautiful at the same time? I like to think it can...
( , Thu 24 Nov 2005, 22:57, Reply)
WARNING: This is pretty foul.
Whilst studying at Brighton Uni I found myself in the 'Market Diner', a 24 filth hole of a cafe with a staff consisting of 15 year old proto rapists and greasy-haired old hags. It was about 4.00am, I was very drunk.
I had been there many times before and been a lot drunker, but something was different this time.
After finishing my egg and sausage sandwich, I made my excuses to my friends and staggered to the toilets. After a good long drunken piss, something caught my eye; the toilet brush.
In my drunken haze I thought it might be a laugh to check if there was any poo on the end. There was. My actions from this point on are worthy of both revulsion and worship in equal measure; both the greatest and the most terrible thing I have ever done at the same time.
I took the soiled brush and wrote on the tiled wall in foot high letters, as carefully as I could: CLEAN ME
Whenever I look back on this incident, I always try to imagine the expression on the member of staffs face who went in there on a routine toilet roll check and found my dirty, stinking protest.
Can something be both unimaginably foul and breathtakingly beautiful at the same time? I like to think it can...
( , Thu 24 Nov 2005, 22:57, Reply)
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