I feel for you...
In fact that just made me cry.

Although we didn't meet on the net my story is similar. When we met (under strange and not ideal circumstances, both of us having just come out of long relationships and still living with our exes) it was like how people fall in love in the movies, and until then I hadn't believed that was really possible... we both felt like we'd come home... until we started sharing a home.

We couldn't understand why we just couldn't manage a relationship when we loved each other so much. I still can't, really. But it was, as you say, an emotional rollercoaster. We wanted each other with a passion, still do, but it just doesn't work. So we broke up. Twice. First time it was my decision, second time (a couple of months ago) it was his. After the first break up we stayed friends. It was torture. So now he has decided to break off contact with me because it's just too painful.

There's a huge 'him' shaped hole in my life.

Recently he de-friended me on facebook because, he said, he kept checking my page all the time, torturing himself. So now the lost and broken part of MY soul that is wandering around looking for him gets no comfort... none at all... I still look at his friends list and wonder who he's doing what with... and feel left out and jealous.

We agreed after our first break up that if neither of us had met anyone else by the time I'm 40 we'll get married. I bumped into him the other day... time went into slow motion and I lost control of my body... but we talked, and he said even if I HAVE met someone else, we're getting married on my 40th birthday, and by then he'll be bigger and stronger and will fight anyone he has to.

Eight years... and counting...
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Thu 11 Sep 2008, 20:09, Reply)