About 15 years ago....
I recieved a valentines card from a girl that I had apparently met on Hogmaney but couldn't remember. This in itself should have sent warning signs flashing but nonetheless i was young, naive and desperately in need of the fairer sex's company so after asking my brother about her (he was friends with the girls brother)I agreed to meet up for a date.

Upon meeting this young maiden I realised that she wasn't my type not that there was anything wrong with her just that I didn't find her attractive or had anything in common with her but being the gutless creature that I am I agreed to meet up with her again.....

Two months later as we're on a "date" I thought enoughs enough she's never going to dump me so I finally managed to work my self up to it after having a few drinks and shouting to myself in a De Niro syle in the pub toilet mirror.

Phew...I thought but then the letters started to arrive. Every day.

One day she would be saying "I love you" the next "I hope you die of AIDS" the next "you better watch you're back i'm going to kill you" etc..

Also the car outside my house that would speed away as soon as I stepped out the door and the horrible feeling that as i walked home from the pub down the country lanes in the pitch black that any moment was going to be my last.

Eventually the letters stopped after she was sectioned to the psychiatric hospital after attempting to murder her mum in the local high street.

When i questioned my brother about this he just grinned at me and said "Yeah, she's been in and out of "Insert local hospital" since she was a kid"

Ten years on and I feel a hand grab my arse and as I turn round to see her smiling at me and saying "you haven't changed a bit".

First time I'd downed a pint since I was in my teens.

Sorry for length. Back to lurking.
(Harold's hip man!!, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 12:46, Reply)