This is long but bloody funny
WRITTEN TO PISS OFF A FRIEND WHO WAS VERY HOMOPHOBIC AT THE TIME (RORY FITZ)

In hindsight it's more than a tad un-PC but hell, it was the nineties, man........

Rory woke one sunny morn, to think about why he was born,
"Is my life a one-way street, or can I dance to a different beat?"
He pondered on his destiny, and what his life was meant to be
Should he be happy with what he's given, or should he try to do more livin?
"Each day I'll try out something new", And that's what he set out to do

He looked back on his life so far, Soccer, birds, time at the bar.
Humdrum it was, becoming lazy, "It's time I got a little crazy"
I've scored some chicks, I've had a laugh, it's time to walk a different path"

And so on this momentous day, Rory decided he'd be gay.
It was a major lifestyle swing, coz packing fudge was not his thing.

"George Michael, Prince, and Elton John will be my lords, I'll sing their songs.
I'll hang around with boys in frocks, and suck on many drag-queens' cocks"

He danced in clubs, YMCA, and fell in love with being gay
"Queers are great, they're so much fun, I even like the taste of cum!!"

After a month, at last, at last, he took his first man up the ass.
His partner's cock, to big to measure, filled Rory with ENORMOUS pleasure
"I am in love!" he screamed in pain, as Nigel shafted him again.
He and Nigel spent an hour, getting horny in the shower.

His new life began to take its toll, on Rory's little dainty hole
His ring was raw, each night he bled from having orgies in his bed
Too many men, too hard, too fast, had ruptured membranes in his ass
Truly buggered, what could he do? One more knob and he was through.
He was so sad, he cried and cried (he'd loved the feel of men inside)

And that's the story of Rory Fitz, who winces every time he shits
His life is ruined, his ring in shreds
and, having Aids, he'll soon be dead.
(Coomy, Fri 12 Aug 2005, 19:04, Reply)