Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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I was a mistake....Just 3 years ago (I'm 22 now) I overheard my dearest mother talking to my youngest cousin about my birth, whilst we were on holiday in Majorca....
"Well, me and your Uncle used to do a lot of drugs in the 80's, and when Sean was conceived, we were off our heads on magic mushroom and LSD"
So, after hearing this revelation, I quickly piped up "WHAT?! YOU DID DRUGS! Wait, so was I like..... an accident??"
"Well... yes, sort of.... It was bonfire night and we went to Skegness for a few days, and you know, one thing led to an another. But it's ok, I always wanted to have a child"
"Er, so what about Dad?" I asked
"Well, he likes you now"
ARRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(, Fri 17 Aug 2007, 8:23, Reply)
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