b3ta.com user Pidgeon Fister
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» My Wanking Disasters

For the love of God...
I think we've got an Ice-cream-van-music-sold-out on our hands here with the "My mate wanked and there was a cuppa when he opened his eyes!"
(Wed 2nd Jun 2004, 2:32, More)

» Embarrassing Injuries

The Space ship....
I was a wee nipper at the time, around seven years old and still mastering the intricacies of my penis. Well, more like have a bit of a fiddle under the covers, but whatever.

One night, during my drowsy fiddlings, I went to sleep without... 'tucking the fireman in'. Yeah... I didn’t pull my foreskin back over my todger.

Cue next morning, I get out of bed, and look down at my tackle. A space ship. My cock looked like a flying saucer thanks to my swollen foreskin inflating so much it made my cock look like a UFO. First thing I did was shout for me mam, bless her, who had the day off work taking me to the doctors.

They put this cream on it, left it under some Clingfilm, and a few minuets later I was back home, eating ice lollys and playing Top Trumps with my mum, all for playing with my self.

Quite a good day in all, except it hurt when I pissed for a good few days after. Didn’t complain about the swelling though!
(Sat 4th Sep 2004, 2:13, More)