» My sex misconceptions

I once believed that after actually having sex
the urge to masturbate frequently would go away. How wrong I was.
(Sun 28th Sep 2008, 5:09, More)

» Useless Information

Fascinating fact
Badgers are actually an illusion caused by light refraction in car headlights so don't worry if you run one over - it was all a trick of the light you can hose off later.
(Mon 21st Mar 2005, 2:49, More)

» Black Sheep

My family is all black sheep with a few white
My dad ran off ages ago and recently helped form a new communist party within the UK to fuel his Napoleon complex and used to do a little work for that lovely mr Galloway who was accused of dealings with Sadam... *ahem* I have weak alleged links with a former Iraqi dictator... that six digrees of seperation?

My little sister openly and proudly tells people about dreams she's had of murdering them and how much she enjoys it and even (No shit) posted it on her online journal. She also killed off one of our older pets by feeding it playing cards, after which it, (In her own words) "Screamed it's self to death for two days."

We don't even speak to anyone on my mum's side of the family except my mum, which is strange because we speak to everyone on my dad's side of the family except my dad.

My mum, by day is a middle aged secondary school/college biology teacher, by night she's a Mansonite. (Seriously)And, at the funeral of her favorite nan whilst at the crematorium almost busted a gut laughing at a bin that said "No hot ashes."

Even every pet we've had has been pretty twisted, we've had a hamster that can unscrew rotastak and unclip most cage doors, a budgie with one leg broken @ 90 degrees permanently and a hamster that was so stupid she killed an entire litter of 11 largely from sitting on them and once failed to escape from a cage with the door open for the entire night.

I could go on for much, much longer but hey, enjoy!
(Sat 15th Jan 2005, 13:53, More)

» Accidental animal cruelty

Dying in your sleep isn't always peaceful
A story related to me by a neurotic friend of my neurotic sister, but her parents confirmed the details. When she was about eight years old, on a normal school morning she and her family get in to the car to do the school run. The key goes in the ignition, the engine starts turning when suddenly there's a loud shriek and a blast of fur from the vents. It appears their cat had climbed inside the car because it was nice and warm and had fallen asleep, only to be digested by the fan belt. In her words she didn't understand what was going on at the time, instead she was "given a lollypop and told to go inside."

A similar series of events happened to my dad once, an early morning in 1988 and he's reversing out of his parking space when there's a series of unpleasant noises. It appears yet another tired cat had decided to sleep under the wheel arch and was now quite literally mangled around the axle. According to my mum he almost started crying as he had to remove it and checked his car all over for cats before he started it for ages after that.
(Fri 7th Dec 2007, 18:40, More)

» Scars with history

Sure you want a photo?
I've got a thin, longish scar on my right buttock from a particularly fast fall onto some broken glass from my bike.
(Sun 6th Feb 2005, 13:28, More)