» Crap meals out

Things I Have Learned From This QoTW
1. Don't travel to England.
2. If you must travel to England, then for Christ's sake don't EAT anything.
(Fri 28th Apr 2006, 23:55, More)

» In the Army Now - The joy of the Armed Forces

I'm not in the Armed Forces, but Grandad was
Pops flew about thirty bombing missions over Germany in WW2 - got a Flying Cross for it and everything.

The one thing he told me about the war that I remember was that the airmen found out, about twenty years before anyone else did, that Switzerland wasn't really neutral in that war. I mean, they talk about finding Jews' jewelry and ingots made out of melted teeth in Swiss bank vaults - yeah, they took that shit, no questions asked. We KNOW about that.

But it'd have given the game away that much earlier if they'd asked the soldiers who flew missions over Germany, circled around over Switz. on the way to the English Channel, and said to themselves, "What the hell - are we getting SHOT AT?" It wasn't just looney Nazi sympathizers with hunting rifles on mountain sides - somebody had FLAK down there and aimed to use it.

So basically, it boils down to: Fuck the Swiss.

/fuck the fuck the swiss, fuck
(Thu 23rd Mar 2006, 20:47, More)

» Airport Stories

I thought I saw Chuck Norris at the airport once
if that counts.
(Fri 3rd Mar 2006, 17:58, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

Sickest joke anyone ever told me that didn't end with "The Aristocrats"
Q: How does Jesus masturbate?

A: [Silently hold hand out flat over crotch, palm facing inward, and move hand in and out in a waving gesture.]
(Tue 6th Dec 2005, 17:34, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

And then there was Mr. Daggett...
He was the teacher who taught us how to say "lying sack of shit" in Latin.
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 18:27, More)