» Customers from Hell

not a customer from hell ...
.. just one who made me very sad. I work in the local minimart thingy in a very middleclass area (guardians and organic veg boxes allround).And thereofre there is the very middleclass attitude of "yes golly homelessness is just awful, just terrible, i always buy the big issue my heart just bleeds for the poor buggers, but ermm i really dont think it appropiate for them to be outside OUR shops etc". Anyway there is a homeless man who has recently been hanging outside the store, a bit smelly, very dirty (but hey, what do you expect from a guy who doesnt even have a bed never mind a shower!) but very nice, very polite, doesnt hassle anyone short of offering to watch there dog for a them if there popping into the store. but get this, our charming, caring manager has decided we are not allowed to serve him alcohol or cigarettes fair play if he appears to be allready drunk or has been causing problems this is store policy but we are NEVER allowed to serve him alcohol on the sole account he is homeless (come on if ANYONE needs a drink its someone who has to sleep on the streets right?). So in he comes one afternoon a (somewhat manky) tenner in one hand and 2 bottles that cliche white lightning. "sorry i cant serve you" "oh umm why?" "sorry" *looks at feet* he needs no more explanation replaces teh bottles and leaves but not without giving me the saddest look in the world. Being a rather sensitive young girl at the height of hormone induced emotional unstability - i manage to annoince with my voice cracking "assitance till 1 please" before running off to the toilets to have a little cry and lookinga little bit insane to customers and collegues alike. so umm basically teh moral of this (long and not excactly rib cracking story is) the coop pretends to be all good and ethical but hwen it comes to the homeless are actually a little bit mean. boo!hiss!

i shant apoligise for length you chose to read this far (maybe in anticiaption of funny/meaningful/puntastic/vaugely intersting punchline ... err sorry folks!)

spelling and grammer atrocious (yes this may well be spelt wrong ) but i just can't resist them big words!
(Wed 10th Sep 2008, 1:33, More)

» Cougars and Sugar Daddies

and this is my wife ...
Oh no! it's the wife/hubby run! seems to be a theme in this QOTW trust me it can be so much worse...
Close your eyes and picture the scene (ok don't close your eyes else you cant read the rest of the story so maybe squint a little)
Aged 16 all my mates braggging about there excting and varied conquests feeling the need to have at least one tale to tell in I never I was ON THE PULL!
And as was luck would have it, first bar we go to there was one gourgeous guy who couldnt keep his eyes off me!
Him: " not wanting to be too forward but you're gourgeous!
Me: (glutton for compliments) Oh thanks im *loobyla* im 16 are you in my college...
*lots of conversation where he defintly assures me that he too is a collge student a bit older then me at 22 studying something or other which made it seem quite beliveable etc*
One thing leads to another and I have my skirt hiked up and my legs spread eagled all over his top quality bedroom suite ("this seems well nice for a student" "oh um yeah...")

Every position known to my young mind and plus some was enjoyed until the inevitable sleepy time.
Wakes up and turns bleary eyed to a grinning bed partner
(actual quote, these words for ever burnt upon my memory)
"hey cutey, i know i said i was 22 well.. if truth be told im 31 ("ahh waaaaah") this is my wife x she was listening over last night how do you feel about a mummy and daddy's game"
Run? I was out there so fast a lovely old dear had to tell me on the bus my skirt was inside out.
(Tue 9th Dec 2008, 1:36, More)

» Procrastination

one or possibly two conjoined words.
facebook.

i have nothing more to add
(Fri 14th Nov 2008, 1:32, More)