b3ta.com user NickB
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» The Dirty Secrets of Your Trade

Don;t work in ICT
I've spent the last 4 years on and off working in PC repairs, and all we do is look through peoples files.

When you bring your PC in, give us fair warning there is porn on there, we won't laugh, but we will report you you if it's too dodgey. If you deny it and we find it, hooo, we will take this michael out of you, seriously, just own up right off, tell us where it is, and we;ll just fix the problem and not go looking for it.

Because we all know you have a porn folder or 6 somewhere.

Also, You will never be disturbed until you find gay horse porn on a 12 year old girls PC.
(Wed 3rd Oct 2007, 22:14, More)

» Dentists


I had to go to the dentist a few weeks ago, to have my back teeth taken out so I could have my wisdom teeth row through.

So I'm waiting in the small pathetic funtcucking excuse of a waiting room, and all I can here is screaming from the next door, with my dentist saying "It's only a small pair of pliers"
At this point I promptly get up, walk into the room, and stab my dentist in the eye with his fuckoff drill he was wielding in his other hand.

With blood spurting from his eye, I expected them both to shut the hell up, but alas, this was not the case.

I am now wanted by East Berkshire police, and will most likely get bummed by a big black guy called "Big Jeff" if I get caught.
(Thu 2nd Nov 2006, 19:17, More)