b3ta.com user randomstupidname
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» I don't understand the attraction

Skinny women
Why would I want to share my bed (or a wall in an alley) with a bag of bones, when voluptuous curvaceous girls feel and look so much better?

Why should I feel a little apprehensive of saying that I prefer the curvy figure, as all other men seem to want to rub themselves up and down a xylophone in skin?

Curves rule.
(Thu 15th Oct 2009, 19:02, More)

» Helicopter Parents

Mother dearest
was oppressive to say the least. I had no confidence at all to do anything on my own and this affects me to this day.

Amongst the stunts she pulled during my time at home:
- walked me to middle school on my first day- aged 9
- sent bus fare into class one rainy day with my dad - aged 14 (!!)
- sent me to bed every night at 800-830 up until the age of about 13-14, I was the only kid in school who had never watched a whole episode of The Bill!
- told my 6' 4 scary headmaster that he would not under any circumstance keep me after school - aged 13
- told the same head that if he ever even thought of caning me she would do the same to him then have him locked up for assault
- would only let me out of the house after I had asked permission and told her where I was going, who with and what time I would return, up until the age of about 19- I started work at 16 FFS.
- when my pregnant then-girlfriend wanted to stay over whilst they were away, she asked in all seriousness where I would be sleeping as she would obviously be using my bed. Note the word pregnant once more if you will.
- sent me a text message after she and my father split up and we were not on good terms, telling me she was my mother and I *would* do as she says - aged 29. I still recall the exact words nearly 8 years on: "I am your mother and you WILL".

My brother turned out a complete social leper. I've at least managed to move out, get a job, a family, a life- he's 32 and still at home, unemployed, literally no friends whatsoever apart from internet chatrooms, claiming disability allowance on grounds of mental problems.

I have tried to be the opposite with my daughter, she is confident and outgoing, fears nothing and is an absolute delight, I am so proud of her and she is going to have the chances and success I was never given the opportunity or encouragement to have. I'm not trying to lead my life through her, just give her everything I was never given.

The ironic thing is that she divorced my father on grounds of mental cruelty and accused him of stifling her and being a control freak.

No lols so far, so I will finish by saying she has better stubble than me, genuinely has to shave a few times a week and could be a first class circus bearded 'lady' if she didn't.

/bitter and resentful
(Sat 12th Sep 2009, 0:45, More)

» IT Support

Not support as such
and possibly mentioned before, but utterly true...

~~lines of waviness~~back to early 90s~~beige keyboards & green screens~~

Many years ago I worked for a (tempera)mental old nutter. One day he was in his office behind the clear glass partition going absolutely raving batshit about something. He would have made Alex Ferguson, mid hairdryer rant, look pale and calm. Pens and cups were flying. Expletives were flying. PC almost went flying. After a couple of minutes, which seemed like longer in rage-time, came a cry for assistance.

"Get the FUCK in here, right fucking NOW!" he shrieks. He had a way with words, mostly like Chubby Brown on a sponsored curse-a-thon.

Wondering what I or someone had screwed up, I went in.

"Tony? What the hell's going on?"

"WHERE THE CUNTING FUCK IS THE BASTARD "A" ON THIS FUCKING BASTARD KEYBOARD?"
(Thu 24th Sep 2009, 23:34, More)

» Presents

A bag and a belt for the missus
Should fix the vacuum up a treat

/old joke
(Fri 27th Nov 2009, 13:51, More)

» Irrational Hatred

James Corden
Yes, the Comic Relief sketch was fairly amusing but only because of all the 'celebs' taking the piss out of themselves and kudos to them.

Otherwise, a fat unfunny fuck.
(Fri 1st Apr 2011, 10:06, More)
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