» School Days

Best. Fight. Ever.
It's a tale of two fights really.

First up we had two of the 'bigger boys' punching and pummeling the life out of each other. A real fist swinging nasty school fight. You know the kind, where all the repressed homosexual tension is released as fists. After about a minute, the crowd became noticeably thinner, until eventually the two pugilists were left standing there, bemused at their lack of an audience*. What on this earth could have drawn secondary school kids away from the fight of the century?

I'll tell you what, only the greatest match up in the world! A really weird kid with a glass eye was chasing and beating a really fat girl with a stick. She in turn was attempting to run away whilst every-so-often swinging one of her meaty arms in a cruel looking haymaker.

I don't know why a cyclops would want to beat a big girl, and I don't want to know why. All I do know is that about 200 kids were following them, chanting and giving advice. Like the little guy in Rocky. But more high pitched. And with chanting.

Between y'all and me, if she'd connected, the eye would have popped out, no question in my mind. It would have been the icing on the cake. She had meaty meaty limbs, I tell thee.

*They may, or may not, have then kissed and began bumming. I didn't see, but am willing to assume.
(Mon 2nd Feb 2009, 1:40, More)