Profile for Hitler's other ball.:
Billy Connolly once rode my friend's bike from London to Dundee. He never got it back.
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- a member for 16 years, 3 months and 28 days
- has posted 15 messages on the main board
- has posted 1 messages on the talk board
- has posted 7 messages on the links board
- (including 4 links)
- has posted 18 stories and 22 replies on question of the week
- They liked 5 pictures, 3 links, 0 talk posts, and 24 qotw answers.
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Billy Connolly once rode my friend's bike from London to Dundee. He never got it back.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Letters they'll never read
Dear Loose Women
please please please please please just shut the fuck up.
(Tue 9th Mar 2010, 16:06, More)
Dear Loose Women
please please please please please just shut the fuck up.
(Tue 9th Mar 2010, 16:06, More)
» Turning into your parents
another one
another similarity is that we've both been inside my mum. I lasted longer, mind.
(Fri 1st May 2009, 6:37, More)
another one
another similarity is that we've both been inside my mum. I lasted longer, mind.
(Fri 1st May 2009, 6:37, More)
» Pubs
not my local but I'm in there fairly often
In the village where I sometimes drink when I'm home from uni there are 2 people with certified downs, one of them collects glasses in a pub I drink in, the other I see around and about and have spoken to a few times. The two downies hate each other with a passion, though. One night I'm sat in the pub with a few mates when Paul* (the none glass collecting downy.) Walks into the pub. He sits down with a pint of bitter and a bag of quavers enjoying himself. James* (the glass collector) has seen this as an insult as he's walking into his place of work. Moving in on his turf. James goes over and tells him to get out. Paul having done nothing wrong says no, so James grabs Pauls pint and throws it over him. Paul reacts and punches him in the face, the two start to wrestle until they're split up by the land lord who's stood behind the bar poking them with a snooker cue. James is sent home while Paul is cleaned up and apologised to.
I've not seen anything to top that but I have other stories which I'll post later on.
*names changed to protect the innocent.
(Fri 6th Feb 2009, 4:37, More)
not my local but I'm in there fairly often
In the village where I sometimes drink when I'm home from uni there are 2 people with certified downs, one of them collects glasses in a pub I drink in, the other I see around and about and have spoken to a few times. The two downies hate each other with a passion, though. One night I'm sat in the pub with a few mates when Paul* (the none glass collecting downy.) Walks into the pub. He sits down with a pint of bitter and a bag of quavers enjoying himself. James* (the glass collector) has seen this as an insult as he's walking into his place of work. Moving in on his turf. James goes over and tells him to get out. Paul having done nothing wrong says no, so James grabs Pauls pint and throws it over him. Paul reacts and punches him in the face, the two start to wrestle until they're split up by the land lord who's stood behind the bar poking them with a snooker cue. James is sent home while Paul is cleaned up and apologised to.
I've not seen anything to top that but I have other stories which I'll post later on.
*names changed to protect the innocent.
(Fri 6th Feb 2009, 4:37, More)
» Good Advice
2 quick ones before bed
when having a widdle if you piss on the toilet seat wait until you've finished to wipe it up or you will end up pissing all over your hand.
I was out in the pub having a few beers in the pub I got talking to an elderly chap of 82. When we were leaving he imparted the best advice I've ever heard "Lads, don't get old. It's fucking shit." Beautiful in it's simplicity.
length, well you can see why I've never had a girlfriend.
(Sun 23rd May 2010, 3:16, More)
2 quick ones before bed
when having a widdle if you piss on the toilet seat wait until you've finished to wipe it up or you will end up pissing all over your hand.
I was out in the pub having a few beers in the pub I got talking to an elderly chap of 82. When we were leaving he imparted the best advice I've ever heard "Lads, don't get old. It's fucking shit." Beautiful in it's simplicity.
length, well you can see why I've never had a girlfriend.
(Sun 23rd May 2010, 3:16, More)
» Best and worst TV ads
That one where the fella sticks a dirty grill in a bag
and then the tagline is "so easy even a man can do it"
You know what else a man can do? Give you a smack with the grill and make you live in a sheltered home for a few weeks you fucking cow.
EDIT: Here are the best adverts ever.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrmMAUdD1Yg
(Thu 15th Apr 2010, 18:32, More)
That one where the fella sticks a dirty grill in a bag
and then the tagline is "so easy even a man can do it"
You know what else a man can do? Give you a smack with the grill and make you live in a sheltered home for a few weeks you fucking cow.
EDIT: Here are the best adverts ever.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrmMAUdD1Yg
(Thu 15th Apr 2010, 18:32, More)