» The B3TA Confessional

I think it's well past time...
...that I confessed something. Not because it's been weighing heavy on my conscience - because I don't have one - but because I need to prompt those too stupid to have worked it out by now.

Many years ago, I dated someone in the same profession as me - we were in the same industry, but had different job titles.

Oh, he was amazing - really good looking, 6'5" tall (and so very well hung), witty, charming, intelligent. (I have to admit that I was so loved up, when he gave me that look that turned me on so...well, a little bit of wee came out. Every time.) And I wasn't exactly too shabby, either. Although my looks have faded somewhat over the years (I'm still nice to look at, even if that's the only thing I'm nice for these days), and my tits now polish my shoes, back then I was just incredibly beautiful. And intelligent, too - I speak four languages. We seemed to be the perfect couple. I have never, ever been so in love - not before, and not since. And I thought he felt the same way, too.

But he dumped me because, apparently, I was "a psycho". I was absolutely devastated. All the plans we'd made for our future together, all the things we were going to do together, all the places we were going to visit together. All the adventures we were going to have together. All gone.

But I had a plan to get him back for breaking my heart. And because I wouldn't act on it for many, many years, it would have that much more impact.

I told anyone who'd listen that I'd been raped. But here's the really clever bit - I didn't name him as my attacker, not publicly. I just 'let it slip' that it was him to a few close friends, who believed me. And we agreed that it would do far more damage to him to reveal his identity indirectly, as that way the question of his guilt or innocence could never truly be known outside those who actually knew that he didn't rape me at all.

I did all the ground work, spreading the rumours through my friends so that I could never be quoted directly by those not in on it. It took a while, but it worked better that way. It made it look like I was telling the truth, or at least that the truth was being told on my behalf.

I waited years for my opportunity to tell the world my lie without actually having to tell them - quite literally playing the victim, and never commenting on it either way so that my lie could be told without any real consequences for me. Ah, the loopholes of the British system of law - absolutely delicious. Put very simply, I (very indirectly) got someone to blab for me and try to act innocently as if it was just a slip of the tongue, and then I just sat back and watched as the furore exploded around me.

It was incredible to watch. The rumour spread like wildfire. Very quickly, but also very slowly, my former boyfriend's life crumbled around him - his career as well, but I wanted to destroy his LIFE. I wanted to hurt him. I wanted him to end up taking his own life, and for the questions never to be answered. I was also amazed to see that there were other allegations popping up out of nowhere - almost as if they were breeding like rabbits - from women as desperate for the attention as I was. And you know what? I didn't begrudge them that. I didn't mind one little bit that they were trying to grab my limelight, because they were strengthening my case to be believed, and causing more questions to be asked.

I saw the effect it had on him, and I was pleased. Smugly so. I still am. It went even better than I had ever dare let myself dream. I had destroyed him. I had ruined his life. To this day, there is still a massive question mark over him. He actually went to court over the other allegations...he wasn't charged, but so what? Mud sticks.

And stick to him it still does, despite him being 100% innocent of what I accused him of. We don't want to disbelieve someone who claims to have suffered rape...I think it's natural to believe a story like that. Because it happens to so very many people - from all walks of life - most people will believe that there's no smoke without fire. Whatever happens, I look as innocent as this man really is. The beauty of it is that no-one will ever know...

Christ, that feels better. I can't believe I was able to leave it this long before I told people about it.

But I need to go now; I'm actually away on business as you read this, but I'm leaving a friend with instructions to post this on my behalf in case it's over the next couple of weeks that 'confessions' is the Q.O.T.W. I suggested it on the board quite some time ago, but it might not get picked as I think it's been done before.

But I just had to get this off my chest. Like I said, not to ease my conscience, but because I've been dying to tell people how I ruined this bastard's life for...well, about 7 or 8 years now. I just couldn't hold it in any longer.

And do you know something? I'd love to be able to say that I'm sorry - just to appear human.

But I'm not.
(Tue 31st Aug 2010, 21:10, More)

» Unusual talents

I can destroy someone's career - not to mention their good name - without actually saying anything.
Bit hard to talk with loads of cocks in your mouth, though.
(Thu 18th Nov 2010, 23:11, More)

» Broken Promises

I promised that we'd stay on good terms, and that I wouldn't tell any lies about him.
Whoops.
(Mon 6th Dec 2010, 7:04, More)