CommonFreddy Woo writes, "My wife thinks calling the front room a lounge is common. Worse, a friend of hers recently admonished her daughter for calling a toilet, a toilet. Lavatory darling. It's lavatory."
My own mother refused to let me use the word 'oblong' instead of 'rectangle'. Which is just odd, to be honest.
What stuff do you think is common?
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chthonic, Thu 16 Oct 2008, 16:06)
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I enjoy being commonEspecially at work dos, meetings, important conference calls etc. It makes me smile when everyone else is using 'corpspeak' (thought grenade, blue-sky thinking, you know all that office bingo fodder) and I turn around and say, 'You know what, I'm not accepting that document because it's tat. I'm not going to approve it because it's been written by a mong and I'm angry that you've even wasted my time presenting it to me.' Helps of course that I have a broad Essex accent (innit guv) with a bit of Manc thrown in...
The best bit, I think, was when I turned up to work in a huge, beaten-up Leyland DAF van - with no paperwork on it obviously :-) - that looked as if someone had literally beaten their way out of the back doors, probably while tied up. I bought it from the gypsies. Looked cracking lined up next to my colleague's Audis and BMWs. Who was waiting for me in the car park? Half the people I was supposed to be presenting to - customers and colleagues alike - who were outside having a crafty fag. I wasn't embarrassed, but they were. Common? Facking right guvnor. LOVE IT.
(, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 11:10, 2 replies)
Made my day!My Essex accent gets used a lot. Beer enhances it. I also now have a Dorset twang.
Big presentations by suppliers, bored shitless - i like nothing better than saying "But it don't mean nuffing" - " Nah mate, it don't mean nuffing" - "Wot you are telling me mate - it does not ring true. Are you trying to sell me stuff from the back of a van?". Wannabe posh IT software salesmen, big tie knot, Audi. Its great to just dismiss them, and ask them to leave "You should write for BBC3 coz when i read your proposal i haven't laughed so much since i went up west"
They really don't know what to say. And my beat up 94k Ford ka toots as i drive out of the car park.
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bazza van der trance , ooh baby baby, baby baby. Get up on this., Fri 17 Oct 2008, 11:51,
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I can also recommend getting a knackered looking motorbike and parking it next to the row of shiny Harleys at nearby pub when it's their club night, always a good conversation starter. You soon find out out who the utter snobs are.
(, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 13:16, closed)
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