A little longer ago
When I was six or so, the family cleared off on a package holiday to the Costa del Shit. You know the drill. In the hotel bar on the first night there was a kiddies talent contest. At this stage I could sing all the words to Yellow Submarine in that special completely tone deaf way only six year old kids can. So I did, and I won!

Can't remember what I won, but apparently my mum got some enormous cocktail befitting Del Boy (I guess vast quantities of alcohol graced with glace cherries and little umbrellas on sticks and all that palarver hadn't yet quite gone out of fashion. Along with Deirdre Barlow specs which my mum wears in all the photos of that era, despite being mid-30s at that time).

So the next night - we were back in the same bar and I was singing Yellow Submarine once more.

(So I guess my story is that my mum's a borderline alcoholic who'll pimp her own child out for a Tia Maria and Lucozade. Hmm)
(Chiliconcarne's Waiting What place is this, Histor?, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 20:59, 2 replies)

Son!!

(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 19 Aug 2011, 22:11, closed)

Mother!!
No, not really. You wouldn't say that, you wouldn't think it, you wouldn't wish it on a child.
(Chiliconcarne's Waiting What place is this, Histor?, Sat 20 Aug 2011, 0:32, closed)