There she blows...
When I was 19, I worked in a cocktail bar in a Nightclub in Frodsham - if you know Frodsham, you know the place I'm on about.

It opened at 8pm, but was normally dead until 10.30-ish, when the pubs started letting out. But this one Friday night, they had 2 coach parties in - a Stag and a Hen. This was a bit of a pain in the arse - the normal slow start went out the window, as everyone came through to our bar (given the main room was dead), and set about getting shit-faced.

After about an hour's solid boozing, a Tarzan-o-gram came in and did his thing. The whole bar watched, had a good laugh, and then it came to an end. At which point, three of the Hen party grabbed Tarzan (who was by now down to his loincloth), whilst the Hen ripped the loincloth off, pulled his flesh-coloured thong down and started giving the guy a blow-job. Fuck me, the place went mad - we had people standing on the BAR to watch, the crowd was so deep (I should know, I was one of them).

The Bouncers heard about this, came racing in and split everyone up (Tarzan looked relieved and disappointed at the same time). Given it was the Hen, the Bouncers told her to behave herself (they'd normally have flung her out).

More cocktails get consumed.

About 20 minutes later, the Stag party start singing "Get yer tit's out, get yer tit's out, GET YER TIT'S OUT FOR THE LADS" to the Hen - who obliges, and runs round flashing everyone.

The Bouncers roll back in, tell the Stag's to shut up, and tell the Hen, in no uncertain terms, that if she whips 'em out again, she's outta there (a shame, I felt, as she had what I understand thse days is referred to as a 'splendid rack').

Not 20 mins later (so it's not even 10pm yet), 4 of the Hen party make a daring raid into the Stag group's part of the Bar, and get the kecks off the Stag, at which point the Hen runs over and starts blowing the guy. Cue the same response as last time, everyone back up on the bar, the Bouncers come flying in, only to face some fierce opposition, as some of the Stag group throwing punches to hold them off so the Hen can finish what she's started.

End result: the Hen, the Stag, and about half of each group get flung out to spend the rest of the night sitting on coaches in the car park waiting for the remains of their groups to come out.

Happy days...
(Apathyman Prepare to be underwhelmed..., Fri 6 Feb 2009, 11:56, 6 replies)

She obviously never followed the old proverb:
"Too many cocks spoil the breath..."
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 6 Feb 2009, 12:23, closed)

The View?

(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 6 Feb 2009, 13:49, closed)

Well...
...You might say that. I couldn't possibly comment...
(Apathyman Prepare to be underwhelmed..., Sat 7 Feb 2009, 1:28, closed)

The View

When did that have a cocktail bar?
(Kip, Tue 10 Feb 2009, 16:28, closed)

what she should have done


was to blow the bouncers first for twas probably only jealousy from which they suffered, also in a 'post blown' state they would probably not be so bothered about the little things like people going nuts...

practical considerations such as this though are generally not heeded when one is drunk..
(The Cats Twat, Fri 6 Feb 2009, 19:26, closed)

There's nothing quite so dangerous
as an unexploded Hen night. Anything can happen and probably will.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 7 Feb 2009, 7:17, closed)