If things get really bad - Credit Crunch Cops.
Using daps insteads of batons.

Hireing the mentaly ill and straping them to the roof of cars NNNNEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNEEEERRRRRRRRRR.

Car battery, paperclip chains and a catapult for a portable tazer.

Holes in the floor - flintstone style cop cars.

Prison cells come with giant hamster wheels conected to generators. Inmates can run round the wheel trying to get food off a piece of string.

Pringle pots filled with stones - door bashers

Leashes around drug users necks, to be used as sniffer dogs, promises of a free hit from the find to encourage them.

Premium rate emergency calls, doubled up as "the naughty voluptious police woman" number.

Wild west wanted posters in pubs/shops. Rewards for bounty hunters in the way of free food.

Police men and women stripping for extra money while on the job (will help when delivering bad news)

Will hire anyone from the public who can count to 20 withought using their toes (fingers OK) and call them special .... oh wait
(Lord Potato, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 4:31, 5 replies)

now THIS
is an improvement on the 5 pages (myself included) of tedious whining/smugness

bravo. specially for the mental image of a copper stripping while delivering the news that your new bride was hit by a car on a pelican crossing, and the fetus she was carrying shot out with such force it went straight through your gran. who she was meeting and now all 3 are dead. ok that last bit i can't really attribute to your post.. maybe i should see someone about this.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 5:37, closed)

Clicked
because you made me do a lol *click*
( chart cat has an itch, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 7:55, closed)

Shirley
Bounty hunters should get paid in Bounty bars?
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 10:24, closed)

This should be implemented
I love the pringles idea (makes own door basher, 2 for £2)
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 10:29, closed)

wiiiii..naAArrrr.....wiiiiiii...naAAAARRrrr..!!
Genius.. In a day of total crapness this post makes me grin like a happy mong *glees* Much appreciated :D
(Hikikomori** watching cartoons on, Fri 23 Jan 2009, 18:33, closed)