Leave Mrs. B alone!
One of the places I used to live in Southampton was a bikers chapterhouse (basically a house that was the headquarters for a biker gang).
When people think of biker gangs they think of drug taking, kneecapping, granny beating antichrists.

Some are, lots are not.

I moved in about 2 months after the house was taken over. There were lots of big, smelly, scary bikers living there.

The area was a huge blue rinse zone and it didn't take too long for them to realise that we weren't what we appeared.

Before long I'd be wandering down the road in cut offs, long hair, three days growth and generally looking quite scary.

More often than not I'd have a little old lady coming up to me at the pedestrian crossing and asking me to help them cross the road (deary).

In the back garden we had about 15-20 apple trees. They were all cookers and there was a little old lady next door that came round to ask, as we weren't using them, if she could use them to make pies.

We had no problem with this what so ever, infact we'd pick them when they became ripe and take them round to her and she'd bring us vast quantities of homemade apple pies
. Everyone loved Mrs. B.

One day about twenty of us are lounging around smoking herbal cigarettes and there's a shout from the driveway.

A biker runs in and shouts, 'They're mugging Mrs. B.'

We all run out. Fuck with Mrs. B and you fuck with us!

We get into the road and there's two guys (obviously pissed off as Chavs haven't been invented and yet to find a way of defining themselves).

I still to this day feel sorry for them. Textbook granny mugging and they hear from behind, 'OI! LEAVE MRS. B ALONE!!!'

They had the living shite kicked out of them, even Mrs. B put a dainty boot in.

The police did turn up and talk to Mrs. B and said, 'So they fell over then.'

We never had any problems with the police after that and they pretty much relied on us to keep an eye on the granny fraternity afterwards.

Sod Help The Aged. You need more bikers.
( riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 11:47, 14 replies)

This has made me smile
Have a *click*
(uk_viper stopped lurking on, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 12:04, closed)

What a lovely story
A friendly old lady, well-meaning biker types and a thorough beating administered to some proto-chavs.

Consider my cockles warmed. *Clicks hard*
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 12:07, closed)

Can't
remember the name of the bikers but, when I lived in Stalybridge, there was a bunch of bikers who'd spend the year collecting food and toys and then delivering them dressed as Santa on motorbikes.


Santa rode a Harley...

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 12:09, closed)

Yeah. There are a few mafia run patch clubs.
But bikers have hoooj hearts. After that story happened we were inundated with shortcrust pastries, pies, cassoroles etc etc etc.

And was bikers tend to be a skilled lot we'd pop round to do any carpentry, plumbing, electronics, heating work or generally pop round for a cupper and to tell the old dears how amazing their cat was:P
( riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 12:21, closed)

I live in kent
and there's a load of bikers who deliver presents to a local childerens hospice... Always seemed a lovely thing to do
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 13:51, closed)

Stories like this
restores my faith in humanity.

Of course if that was to happen now, you'd all be done, and they chavs would get off scott-free
( Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 13:09, closed)

Fantastic
*clicks*
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 13:17, closed)

Im gonna adopt a biker when Im old
This amazingly awesome! *click*
(LittleWhiteTreat, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 13:23, closed)

Anyone seen this?
www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2008/08/22/nyregion/082408-Petnap_index.html

A bunch of bikers who look intimidating, but devote their time to helping kittens and suchlike. Lovely stuff.
(Sundayturkey has the biggest mug of tea, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 15:39, closed)

Lovely stuff
I enjoyed that!
( splorp ®, Tue 3 Mar 2009, 13:02, closed)

Fuckyeah!!
I'm a biker. Most of us are the best people you'll ever meet. Good on you and thank you for helping out Mrs. B. Rock on and ride safe.

In the wind...
(Jeepgun, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 16:14, closed)

Brilliant!
This biker place, does it back onto the railway line going into Southampton, because I grew up there and getting the train into town there was always a house with a big biker sign painted on the back, was probably around 5-6 years ago
(europe-who, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 18:14, closed)

I wondered that
On the right hand side as you go into Southampton.

That's the Hell's Angels clubhouse.

I have the London HQ a couple of streets away from my current flat. Never any bother at all - somthing that cannot be said for the huge gangs of Asian teenagers who roam the streets: last seen having an all-out rumble outside my block, throwing bricks at each other etc.

Bikers, yes. Teenegers, no.

I HAVE SPOKEN.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 16:52, closed)

I'm most emphatically not a biker
While I'm pretty tall, I'm built like a twiglet, wear glasses and a great deal of corduroy, and pretty much constantly have books under my arm and a bemused look on my face. It's not at all uncommon for me to get hassled by chavs and other such dickheads, but I've never once had trouble from bikers and metalheads, be it out on the street or in a rock club where I quite clearly stick out like a sore thumb.

Bikers are, all told, generally pretty nice chaps.
(Ellinikos contains a source of phenylalanine, Tue 3 Mar 2009, 0:59, closed)